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Trading Places: "Looking Good, Feeling Good" Edition (Paramount)
Something about Trading Places always felt a little flat. And now it just looks so 1980s -- or '40s, rather, down to its Frank Capra fairy-tale moralizing and use of blackface, which would never fly at this late date. That said, it's funnier than you remembered, punctuated by the best-ever performances of Dan Aykroyd, Eddie Murphy, and Jamie Lee Curtis; never again would they appear in a film as smart as they are (as illustrated by Norbit, also out this week). The making-of pays appropriate homage to its classy cast: Ralph Bellamy, Don Ameche, and Denholm Elliott. And the Paramount-exec promo clip is indispensable; Murphy and Akyroyd sold the pic to their bosses using the word "cock." Astounding. -- Robert Wilonsky
H.O.T.S.
(Anchor Bay)
A godsend to teenage horndogs at the dawn of the VHS/cable boom, this 1979 breastfest has scarcely aged a day -- it's just as insipid as it looked back then, with the volume turned down in your parents' basement. Co-scripted by '70s sex starlet Cheri Caffaro, with all the storytelling savvy of bus-depot porn, the setup pits a rebel sorority of top-heavy hotties against their snooty rivals. The plot is best savored on chapter skip: Do you really need to know why the chick and two crooks are in a hot-air balloon with a bear, or why Danny Bonaduce is getting his 'nads licked by a seal? But pause when director Gerald Seth Sindell unveils his stroke of cinematic genius: a strip-football climax shot from underneath a topless huddle. And the first T&A appears all of 38 seconds into the movie. Like I said: genius. -- Jim RidleyFantastic Voyage
(Fox)