Friday, May 7, 2010

These shoes: Clothes Whores Pet Peeve No. 3

Posted By on Fri, May 7, 2010 at 2:30 PM

click to enlarge Worse than Crocs, yes?
  • Worse than Crocs, yes?

What's worse than Crocs? You're looking at 'em.

Scott Fitness trainer Keith Earl is modeling the latest in disastrously ugly footwear. They're called Vibram Five-Fingers and the people who swear by them are typically runners, climbers and hikers. It fits right in with the latest fad health craze, the Caveman Diet. (The Troglodyte Diet just didn't have the same ring.)
 
These shoes are your feet's way of saying fuck evolution.  

click to enlarge So functional!
  • So functional!
click to enlarge So gross!
  • So gross!

"It forces your foot to do its job," says Earl. "When I jump, it's harder because there's no spring. It's all me." He adds, "They make me feel like I'm barefoot. I like being barefoot."

As a fitness technique, I get it. But Earl admits he'll wear his outside the gym when he can't find his flip-flops, which usually provokes commentary. He says, "I always hear, 'WHAT ARE THOSE?' And, 'ARE THOSE SOCKS?'"

The upside? "If someone spills liquor on your shoes, I think these are washable, so that's always a plus."

The downside? "Your feet do sweat in these. And if you drop a weight on 'em, it's gonna hurt like a motherfucker."

The other downside: hideousness, although Earl and I agree that the Five Fingers are preferable to exposed man-feet. As he put it, "They're like a foot burqa for dudes."

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