Friday, September 17, 2010

Truman High students must sign contract forbidding 'freaking and grinding' to go to Homecoming

Posted By on Fri, Sep 17, 2010 at 4:12 PM

Don't even think about pulling a nasty move like this at Homecoming.
  • Don't even think about pulling a nasty move like this at Homecoming.
Don't even think about pulling a nasty move like this at Homecoming.
Dirty dancing at Truman High is grinding to a halt. Wait! Not grinding. That's inappropriate. I meant that Homecoming is making out to be a really boring affair. Whoops. What I'm trying to say, is that the staff at Truman High is keeping abreast of how kids these days love to rub their privates together through their denims.

Screw it. You just can't talk about the new dirty dancing contract at Truman High without being scandalous.



Truman High in Independence created a mandatory contract for anyone

wishing to go to the Homecoming dance. It must be signed by both

students and their parents.



The contract forbids students from engaging in "sexually explicit or violence-oriented dancing" and cites freaking, grinding, and moshing as the bad eggs of the movebusting world. There shalt be no bending over, no straddling each other's legs, and no dancing in the following directions: "back-to-front, side-to-back, side-to-front, back-to-back, or (grinding) front-to-front." That leaves students to dance together catty-corner-to-right angle, or upside down.

Per the contract, both feet must remain on the floor, making out is forbidden, and the "touching of breasts, buttocks, or genitals" is an ousting offense. If there's any freaky-freaky on the dance floor, students will be kicked out of the dance and blacklisted from every high school dance for the rest of the year (except for Prom, which was probably exempted for the sake of the chaperones' cultural enrichment).

If you're a Truman Highschooler wondering how you're supposed to have fun at a dance like this, feel free to brush up on moves that are that endorsed by other school administrations.



Or take some time to catch up on your crocheting. You'll probably have more fun.

H/T: KMBC

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