Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Ke$ha and four other faces you wouldn't want to see while wrapping your tool

Posted By on Tue, Mar 8, 2011 at 6:48 AM

Condoms: the Ke$ha edition.
  • Condoms: the Ke$ha edition.

Talk about curbing the birth rate, eh? In a partnership with LifeStyle condoms, the notoriously trashy party girl Ke$ha has recently emblazoned a bunch of condoms with her face, and she blasts them out of the infamous glitter cannon onstage during her shows. For an all-ages show that hosts an 8-foot-tall penis, blasting a bunch of rubbers at the crowd is a pretty rad move toward encouraging kids to have safe sex. On the other hand, though, Ke$ha's glittery, slimy face isn't the most enticing sight when you're getting ready to get it on.

Here are four other musicians with mugs you don't want to see on your condom.

1. Drug-addled Amy Winehouse
Once upon a time, Amy Winehouse used to be a fine-looking British soul singer. Now she looks like one of the Rolling Stones. All I can hear when I see this face is the sound that Sideshow Bob used to make on The Simpsons when he shuddered.

amy_winehouse_late_1.jpg


2. Beth Ditto

You remember the Gossip's large-and-in-charge front lady from our Ugliest Musicians face-off. So, yes, this is cheating. Sorry. But just look at that face. That mug is birth control in JPEG form.

Celebrities_Attending_Vivienne_Westwood_Show_LHZtxUvb_oRl.jpg

3. Susan Boyle

Want to stop teen pregancy? Tell seventh-graders that touching each other's naughty bits will turn them into Susan Boyle when they grow up. (Her picture on the condom will only serve as a reminder of their fate.) This British Idol star may be a nice lady and all -- does she have cats? I feel, for some reason, that she has cats -- but, damn, son.

susan_boyle_pic_itv_585664588.jpg

4. Kelis

What happened, Kelis? Once upon a time, you had boys' milkshakes, er, exploding all over your yard. Why the grill? Why?

kelis_gal_embarrassing.jpg

Here's what the Ke$ha condoms look like. Score 'em -- and score -- at your own peril.

K_Condom_Front.JPG

Read our review of Ke$ha's show at the Midland here.

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