Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Dream Team: Our Fantasy Football Prospectus

Posted by on Wed, Aug 29, 2012 at 8:11 AM

Peyton Hillis is hoping to run his way onto your team this year.
  • Peyton Hillis is hoping to run his way onto your team this year.
The cynical among us would say Chiefs fans are already playing fantasy football every year, even if they aren’t in a league, trying to poach $20 from friends based on the real-world performance of their virtual teams. But if you’re in for the long haul of a 16-game season, you might as well benefit from your vigilance. Here’s a brief, critical guide to your 2012 Chiefs fantasy-football prospects.

Peyton Hillis. The Avalanche cometh. For KC fans, the only thing prettier than Hillis running over somebody at the 1-yard line is Brady Quinn. (Seriously, Quinn is beautiful.) Round to pick ’em: seventh.

Jamaal Charles. His yards-per-carry stat has increased every year he has been in the league. At this rate, he’s on track to run the average of a first down on each touch by 2014. His knee looks fine, and the defenses in the AFC West do not. His Twitter feed regularly announces that he has just had a great workout, and Twitter never lies. Round to pick ’em: second.

Tony Moeaki. The ACL Club is exclusive, one that gets you your own table in the trainer’s room and unlimited game tokens at Dave & Buster’s. Unfortunately, Moeaki’s membership (and let’s hope that this is the last year we hear this media-generated phrase) also means that he’s unlikely to equal the numbers of his breakout rookie season. Round to pick ’em: 13th.

Kevin Boss. OK, so the team’s entire tight-end corps ranked dead-last for fantasy purposes last year, with 34 total catches and one touchdown. Boss looks ready to outscore that squad (though not many other teams’ tight ends), and you don’t get many fantasy opportunities to own a ginger. Round to pick ’em: 13th.

Matt Cassel. He’s really nice, despite coming off a bad breakup — a good guy to spend Sundays with and quietly read the paper. Hey, we should try that new restaurant, he’ll say. "Yes," you’ll answer, "But stop leaving your dirty socks on the floor." Round to pick ’em: 11th.

Dwayne Bowe. It’s a contract year, he spent his holdout hearing how Jon Baldwin may be better than he is, and Tyler Palko is no longer allowed to throw him the football. That’s three cherries, making Bowe a fantasy jackpot waiting to happen. Round to pick ’em: fourth.

The Defense. For too long, this has been the Chiefs’ sole point-scoring unit. For the last three games, it has allowed just 33 points and forced six turnovers. You’re looking at a top-10 defense, if they ever find a kick returner who can score touchdowns. Round to pick ’em: 10th.

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