Urine

Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Pee Party: District Pour House + Kitchen

Posted By on Tue, Sep 2, 2014 at 7:21 AM

Urinating in Waldo.
  • Urinating in Waldo.
Pee Party is an irregular column in which we investigate restrooms around town. 

A perk of living in one place for a long time is the civic knowledge that builds up by watching establishments turn over. To be able to rattle off a list of a commercial building's previous tenants is, for a sad man like myself, one of life's small joys. I especially like to butt into conversations and say things like, "Yeah, back in the early ’90s, when Bier Station was a Circle K..."

Waldo is full of places that used to be other places. District Pour House + Kitchen, which opened last year at 7122 Wornall, replaced the Gaf, an Irish pub, which operated in the space for eight years, starting back in 2005. Before that, it was for many decades home to Romanelli Grill, a restaurant known for its catfish, ancient clientele, and cancerous levels of secondhand smoke. 

I'm too young by about 40 years to have ever hung out at Romanelli Grill, but I did some time at the Gaf. It was a little pricey for a man of my...earnings...but I appreciated that it was usually open late on weeknights and that it was reliably dark, as any authentic Irish pub should be. District is going for a brighter, livelier atmosphere, which is probably wise. It was packed last Friday night when I stopped by for a drink with my folks, who live nearby. I recommend the Smoke n' Clove — bourbon, honey, brown sugar syrup, muddled orange, square ice cube. On to the restrooms. 

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Thursday, June 5, 2014

Pee Party: MiniBar

Posted By on Thu, Jun 5, 2014 at 8:56 AM

Tiny toilets? Read and find out!
  • Tiny toilets? Read and find out!
Pee Party is an irregular column in which we investigate restrooms around town.

The line system at most grocery stores - where you choose the checkout lane that seems like it will move the fastest, and then dumbly commit to it - is wrong and should be eliminated. Instead of many separate lines, there should be one big line, where the person in the front goes to the next available register, like at the bank. Or Wendy's. God, I love Wendy's.

Certain bars and restaurants should eliminate gender distinctions on their lavatories for similar reasons of efficiency. If the restrooms in your bar contain many stalls, then sure, split them up into men's and women's. But if you're a small joint, and you've got two one-toilet rooms, the most sensible thing to do is to keep them unisex. That way, you don't have a situation where there's a bunch of men packed together like dopes outside one restroom while the women's sits empty, or vice versa.

Many cheers, then, for Minibar (3810 Broadway), which, as far as I can tell, did away with its men's and women's rooms sometime in the last year.

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Monday, April 21, 2014

Pee Party: Town Topic on Broadway

Posted By on Mon, Apr 21, 2014 at 9:14 AM

Todays topic: Urinating.
  • Today's topic: Urinating.
Pee Party is an irregular column in which we investigate restrooms around town.

Some people out there - repugnant snobs, I call them; preposterous fools, I call them! - ghettoize Town Topic to the ranks of "drunk food." But Town Topic is to be enjoyed all day, in both sobriety and intoxication. Why else would it be open 24 hours?

I prefer eating at Town Topic (and other greasy-spoon diners) in the mornings, when I am more or less sober. To sit at a counter, drinking black coffee and reading the paper while waiting for an omelet, is about as peaceful as my life gets. I did this last week, and as my Truckstop Omelet was being prepared, I took a trip to the restroom.

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