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Wednesday, March 25, 2009

On the Web

Meat versus meat. Everyone wins.

Posted by Owen Morris on Wed, Mar 25, 2009 at 10:30 AM

allansmeatkatiespence_thumb_510x341.jpg
Flickr: Katie Spence

If 64 games of basketball is not enough competition for you, those brackets are also useful for pitting food against food. Specifically meat.

Food blog So Good is running a 32-item "Meat Madness" tournament, asking its readers to vote on who will advance. The four regions are red meat, poultry, seafood and pork, with voting open 24 hours for two match-ups before closing and the next match-ups begin. As of this writing, ground beef has just trounced venison, and lamb put a smack-down on corned beef.

Not content with a puny 32-team bracket or a system where everyone gets an equal vote, ESPN and New York Times contributor Paul Lukas revealed his 64-meat match-up with four regions of beef, sausage, pork and "meatcellanous." Amazingly, bacon doesn't win. (It does make the finals.) I won't ruin which cut of meat does own the prize but Lukas' bracket has many eccentricities.

For example, in the sausage region, salami is a No. 2 seed while andouille

is a No. 10 seed. In my opinion, salami is OK, but a delicious andouille from Werner's Fine Sausages

is unbeatable. Not according to Lukas, though. The andouille loses in the

first round to chorizo. The meatcellaneous category, while excellently

named, is a travesty, with the No. 15 seed chicken tails beating leg of

lamb, veal cutlet, chicken wings and lamb chops to get to the final

four. What is a chicken tail? Lukas describes it as "equal parts

crunchy, chewy and gooey, it's like a piece of candy, except it's

savory instead of sweet," Sounds like it could be popcorn shrimp.

Lukas' bracket is here.

Running my own tournament with his bracket I came up with a final four

of pot roast, andouille, spare ribs and chicken wings. Pot roast would

beat andouille (you can put gravy on a pot roast) and spare ribs would beat chicken wings (barbecue sauces

beat out Frank's RedHot Sauce). And in the final, Kansas City and

barbecue would prevail, with spare ribs beating pot roast.

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Yes!! I can't imagine being a vegetarian and having to look at those brackets.

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Posted by Owen on 03/25/2009 at 1:51 PM

Mmmm...spare ribs. I just changed my mind about where I'm going to lunch. I have to keep up my 30% higher risk of death, after all.

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Posted by jjskck on 03/25/2009 at 10:02 AM
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