Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Domino's bread bowls in the flesh

Posted by Owen Morris on Tue, Jun 30, 2009 at 10:30 AM

As a food blogger, I get to eat and drink a lot of really great things. But then there are days that involve Domino's and a three-cheese mac-n-cheese that looks like this:

CIMG1714.JPG

KC Beer Blog and Fat City recently conducted a semi-tasting of new Domino's products. "Semi" in the sense we didn't try all of Domino's six new "American Legends" pizzas, just the Memphis barbecue chicken. (There's also the buffalo chicken, Philly cheese steak, Honolulu Hawaiian, Cali chicken bacon ranch and Pacific veggie.) The pizza had decent barbecue sauce but the chicken had the same texture of silicon. It was also nearly $14 for a medium, more than similar pies from local chains such as Minsky's.

But it was the bread bowl that drew everyone's attention.

Fat City wrote a post about the bread bowl earlier this month and included a picture of it from the Web site ThisIsWhyYoureFat.com. This provoked some argument in the comments about whether the accompanying picture was an accurate description of the bread bowl's disgustingness.

The answer is no picture can correctly capture the awful smells and tastes of the mac-n-cheese bread bowl.

Anytime somebody asks where the trash-can is "just in case" upon first

seeing an item of food, you know you'll never forget the dish. The cheese has a glow-in-the-dark orangeness, and underneath that cheese top is layer after layer of penne pasta not

entirely mixed with cheese.

As one taster pointed out, it's not the pasta that's so

bad but the bread-bowl, which is covered with an overpowering garlic

salt that does not mix well with the pasta.

The Onion did a mock news piece about Domino's testing the limits of what humans will eat,

and the company seems to have found the edge with the bread bowl. "If you order this for

your kids, they should send a social worker on the delivery as well,"

one of our tasters said, only half joking. 

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It's been at least twenty-five years since I ate Domino's pizza, so I'm unfamiliar with their current product line. Used to be the only part of a Domino's pizza that was fit to eat was the crust.

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Posted by Realist on June 30, 2009 at 5:21 PM

I so wanted Chimpo's input on this.
Glad I have it.

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Posted by pom. on June 30, 2009 at 10:03 AM

About an hour after consuming, I was overcome with the urge to vomit. Not heartburn. Not regret for eating it. Just a desire to vomit.

Humanity is worse off due to the folks in the Domino's food science department.

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Posted by Chimpotle on June 30, 2009 at 9:43 AM
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