Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Relic Tray: Lord Help Me! The Desperate Dieter

Posted by Charles Ferruzza on Tue, Nov 24, 2009 at 1:37 PM

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Pray away the temptation to eat

​Thanksgiving week is difficult for someone on a diet. Who can resist the sinful temptation to fill a plate with roasted turkey drenched in gravy, mashed potatoes, candied yams all sticky with molten marshmallows, yeasty buttered rolls and all those fabulous desserts?

This is when Beth Hammond's book of 57 devotions, Lord Help Me! The Desperate Dieter (Concordia Publishing House, St. Louis, 1983), might come in handy. When the temptation to overindulge is overwhelming, just turn to page 32:

Lord, It's me again. Your favorite dieter. I have another problem that I need help with -- company. My family will be visiting here for the next two weeks. I can't serve them my diet foods or my diet portions. What is there to do with my diet meals? How dull! No one has ever written a book of 101 ways to serve carrot or celery sticks... Help me Lord not to covet the food of the non-dieters ... Amen."

Or "Litany," the devotion on page 12:

Lord, Do you know what it's like? Can you imagine being fat?"

This book was sold for a quarter at a church white elephant sale last weekend and it was a bargain, since it's rich with confessional revelations, like "Secret Eating" on page 55:

Lord, I can't hide from You. You know about the "goodies" hidden in my dresser, in the laundry hamper, and under my pillow ... Lord, help me stop hoarding food like the squirrel gathering its nuts for the long winter..."

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You are, Meesha. Beth lost that title when she deviously hid "goodies" in the laundry hamper. You know, the place where most normal, clear-thinking people hid drugs.

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Posted by Charles on November 24, 2009 at 5:24 PM

I thought I was the Lord's favorite dieter

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Posted by meesha.v on November 24, 2009 at 1:19 PM
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