| Now there's an idea.... |
I was reminded of this on Sunday while having brunch at a sit-down venue in the Zona Rosa shopping complex. A large group was sharing a meal, and one couple's 3-year-old was running around the dining room, mostly unsupervised. The kid came dangerously close to tripping a couple of patrons as they carried their plates to their table and, in one instance, nearly knocked into a waitress who was hauling a fully loaded tray. The parents wanted to enjoy their own meal, so they kept a peripheral eye on the kid, but they didn't insist that the child sit at the table instead of running underfoot.
When I was a server, unsupervised children were a recurring nightmare. What if I was carrying a tray with hot coffee or heavy water glasses and accidentally dropped something on the child as he or she ran gleefully between tables? Several times I chided unobservant parents for their lack of responsibility and got hateful looks or even a stream of expletives for daring to suggest that they were creating a potential problem. "You should be watching where you're going," one mother snapped. "Little Caitlin is just having fun."
Fun? A restaurant is a place of business, not a playground. In my decades as a server, I never complained about picking up dozens of torn sugar packets, spilled food and serving utensils tossed on the ground, or sopping up melting ice cubes on an uncarpeted floor (a potential accident waiting to happen). But kids running wild around the dining room was something I simply would not stand for, and the rest of the staff usually felt the same way.
I'd grown up on the flip side of this equation: My father was in the liquor industry, and most of the restaurants we visited were his clients. Any behavior that was unacceptable -- crying, yelling, squabbling, getting out of our chairs -- was punishable by a very public spanking.
I'm not advocating that, by any stretch of the imagination. But it did put the fear of God into us, and it was one way to learn restaurant etiquette in a hurry.
My father glared at parents who let their offspring run loose in a dining room and once told a particularly neglectful couple, whose kid was grabbing silverware from other tables, that they were "the worst parents in American history." They were too horrified to respond, but our waitress seemed thrilled.
"All my other tables kept complaining to the manager," she told dad, "but he was afraid to say anything."
"Why?" my father asked.
"Because the child's grandfather owns this restaurant."
(Image via Flickr: Papa Razzi1)
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Wow Bird Queen. Children misbehaving is disgusting? As humans we are born with a rebellious nature. We have to be trained to behave. Children are a work in progress. I don't know if you have children, but children are human beings with their own will. Some have stronger wills than others. I agree that some parents don't discipline their children as they should. However, sometimes good parents have good children that misbehave. And I disagree that you like children. It doesn't sound as though you like people from the tone of your comment.
It can also be a test of patrons and staff for dealing with kids that have special needs like autism.
Some restaurants do a good decent job of providing some food for kids with special needs but there is a lack of decent menus that are both gluten and dairy free.
I swear what would restaurants do without cheese?
I was all for the smoking ban, until I realized my wife and I could no longer sit in the smoking sections to avoid obnoxious children and their indifferent parents. We've received dirty looks from parents more than once, when we have asked our server to be moved away from a table w/ a child throwing a tantrum (or mashed potatoes or silverware...).
Everyone has horror stories about miserable experiences, so I'll share mine. We were at the Golden Ox for dinner one night. It was close to closing time, so there weren't a lot of people in the place. As a result, those of us that were there, were all seated in the same section. The table next to us had a party of 8-10 people, including one small child. After a few minutes, the kid hopped out of his chair, plopped down on the floor and began to beat the metal table leg w/ a spoon. 15 MINUTES OF THAT HELL! None of the adults bothered to give the Stink Eye, much less say anything. Unfortunately, the staff at the Ox did nothing as well. They apologized to us after the fact, but it was sadly obvious that they didn't want to offend the party.
My husband and I have actually been told by OUR parents that we were too strict with our kids in restaurants. From day 1, we didn't tolerate any misbehavior in restaurants and our parents would always say, "Oh come on, they're just kids. Let them have fun." We just put up with it, knowing we were doing the right thing. Now that our kids are 7 and 10, people always remark at how well behaved they are when we go out.
On the flip side of that, I see too many parents tossing their kid a Nintendo DS at restaurants to keep them quiet, which I am not okay with either.
Invidious: My parents were hardly the torchbearers for good parenting, but I agree it's a good line. Most young parents I know are incredibly sensitive when it comes to teaching their children good restaurant etiquette. One friend says the secret is this: "Kids are hungry and bored. Bring snacks and toys." And honestly, I never minded waiting on families with kids as a waiter. Teenagers on prom night were another story....
Great reminder. I am a parent and was never a server and did not know until I read this that is how people feel. I love the sentence your pappy said, "worst parents in American history." I'm going to use that one, often...
One of the most disgusting things in the world is going anywhere that an unbehaved child is. It is a reflection on the parents. I detest trying to enjoy my meal and some mini buffoon is acting uncivilized while their ignorant parent sits there and pretends not to notice what they are doing!
Don't get me wrong, I love children, but I can not tolerate a child misbehaving anywhere, especially in a restaurant.
To put the frosting on the cake, they call the child's name once or twice and then start to count: "One, Two" as if that means anything to the child.
Oh wait, it gets even better. The parents turn around and asks the little cyclone if they want a spanking?
I guess since they never say, "Yes" they do not get one. It is times and children like these that parents need to feed in the comforts of their own den! Yes, I said, "Den" because that is where animals usually live!
The best sign I ever saw in a restaurant was
UNSUPERVISED CHILDREN WILL BE GIVEN AN EXPRESSO, A PUPPY AND SENT HOME
I see parents taking a one- or two-year-old to a good, sit down restaurant and wonder how they can enjoy a meal (much less anyone else).
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