Abortion pranks? Funny. Phone-book foolery? Winner. Combine the two? Instant classic. Yet when a Feist Publications employee sprinkled fake listings throughout her company's yellow pages this year, an uproar ensued. Turns out one of the families facetiously listed under "Abortion Provider" heard from anti-abortion folks, and the experience went over like a third-trimester termination. The temp Feist employee was fired. Of course, no one stopped to chastise the chastisers: zealots who harass physicians for performing legal (last time we checked) medical procedures. Then again, the Feist employee also listed false names under "Pet Grooming," which is not so funny, because a pet lover shouldn't have to dillydally through some idiot's idea of a harmless joke the next time Pebbles needs new bows.