Mama told us never to put dollar bills in our mouths; we never knew where they'd been. But she probably wouldn't worry much about depositing dirty dollar bills between our lips if she knew how we were using them at Lawrence's all-nude strip club, The Outhouse: baiting strippers to rub their boobies in our faces. Suddenly sticking a George Washington in our mouths isn't so bad. The Outhouse is pretty relaxed -- just a bunch of dudes drinking beer and fantasizing about naked women. There's a dream dancer for every fetish -- the buxom blonde with fake tatas, the cute sorority girl, the goth-punk chick. (Be warned -- $20 lap dances are two-for-one until 10 p.m. Don't get chatty; get on with the grinding. We got stiffed, and not in a good way, getting only one dance.) The Outhouse is BYOB, and pay attention to the rules, such as "No lifting head when laying down on stage (keep your feet on the floor, hands to your sides and tongue in your mouth)." And Mom was worried about dirty dollars.
