Week of March24, 2004

Night & Day Events 

Week of March24, 2004

Thursday, March 24
The American male begins as an incredulous Fred Savage, swashbuckles through adolescence in hopes of becoming a heroic Westley, then, sooner than he'd perhaps like, becomes the drunken, quixotic, occasionally pathetic Inigo Montoya. (After that, it's on to Peter Falk.) Though our father may not have been murdered by a six-fingered man, and though we may never get to exchange spontaneous couplets with Andre the Giant, we Inigos take ourselves just seriously enough to maintain some semblance of forward motion, once in a while taking on shady professions but ultimately seeking to put things right -- for ourselves, mostly. And though we have until April 1 to prove ourselves to the world via the University of Kansas Department of Theatre and Film, why wait? Even though we're not a KU student, we'll set up our camcorder and demonstrate once and for all that we have the best Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die in the entire Western Hemisphere. If we win the Mandy Patinkin Challenge (which we won't, because we're not enrolled at KU), we'll get to meet the man himself on April 9 for a showing of the film that started it all, The Princess Bride. Call 785-864-3381 for official rules.

Friday, March 25
Monsters, Inc. is one of those rare animated films (like Shrek) that enjoys pretty high crossover success with adults. The story of an energy factory that gets its power by terrorizing small children -- is it any wonder we liked it? -- racked up $62.5 million on its opening weekend, Disney's all-time highest. We're wondering, however, what happens when Sully, Mike and Boo don skates. Is it just too cutesy, or will parents (we mean, uh, baby-sitters) enjoy the version à la glace? Monsters, Inc. , which opened Wednesday and runs through Sunday, hits the ice at 1 and 7 p.m. today at Kemper Arena (1800 Genessee). Tickets are $13.50 to $42.50; call Ticketmaster at 816-931-3330 to buy them.

Saturday, March 26
The euphemism "bought the farm" originated in earlier wars, when a soldier's death benefits were usually enough to pay off the mortgage on his family's homestead. In the age of agribusiness, the literal act of buying a farm seems almost like a death sentence for an independent crop grower. The average double-cheeseburger-head may not give a cow's ass, but we think the environment, the economy and the tomatoes at Sun Fresh would all be a lot better if more stuff were produced regionally on family farms. Growing Growers is a new local organization that wants to make this happen in an organic, sustainable way. We encourage all aspiring seed sowers to get involved, starting today with the 7th Annual Food Circle Farmers' Exhibition from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. at the Shawnee Civic Center, 13817 Johnson Drive in Shawnee. Call 913-488-1270 for details.

Sunday, March 27
In the shallow dating pool that is Kansas City, we take whatever help we can get. And if that means learning how to read auras so we can avoid guys who mysteriously are able to meet only for lunch and the occasional Monday-night dinner -- not that that's, um, ever happened to us -- so be it. That way, we can circumvent the jerk with a brown aura, which equals deception, and search for a clear, vibrant and consistent yellow about the head, which indicates intelligence. During the class, which meets from 5 to 7 p.m. at Aquarius (3936 Broadway) and costs $20, we'll also receive an aura photo of ourselves along with a printed interpretation, to see what kind of vibes we're putting off. Call 816-235-1448 to register.

Monday, March 28
Although the new upstairs bar at Blayney's of Westport (415 Westport Road, 816-561-3747) is a fine addition to the joint, we won't be found up there tonight. Instead, we'll be in the original, cavernous basement, drinking moonshine (OK, PBR) and listening to local roots rockers the Gaslights, who host Americana Mondays at this blues club, which we hear has become prohibitively overrun with meatseekers on recent weekends. According to sources, the Monday crowd has been light of late, which, along with the $1 cover, makes for a damn good excuse to put Westport back on the list of places to drink and see a band during the week.

Tuesday, March 29
If you think persistent anxiety, irritability and frequent oversleeping are indications that you hate your job, you're wrong. You're just depressed, silly! And according to the Mid-America Coalition on Health Care, 15 percent to 20 percent of the population suffers these symptoms as well as others, such as fatigue, difficulty making decisions and increased drinking. All of which can affect a worker's productivity (decreased) and rates of error (increased), which is bad news for business. So the Greater Kansas City Chamber of Commerce is holding a forum to discuss the human and financial costs of depression in the office and in society -- but we're sure the employers and health-care stakeholders who help make up the Community Initiative on Depression are mostly concerned with their workers' welfare. KC Takes on the Blues Day runs today from 4:30 to 6:30 p.m. in the Rooftop Ballroom of the Fairmont on the Plaza (401 Ward Parkway). Call 816-374-5489 or see www.kcchamber.com to register.

Wednesday, March 30
February in Brazil, the hormonal hurricane of Carnival flooded the streets of Rio de Janeiro. Meanwhile, in the Midwest, the only dancing done outside was an occasional fury-stomp jig performed by people whose car doors were frozen shut. Now that our world is beginning to thaw, we can make up for missed revelry and get our figures ready for springtime ass-cleavage-baring (not) by learning some Afro-Brazilian samba moves today at 7:45 p.m. at City in Motion School of Dance (3925 Main, 816-561-2882). Cost is $9 and includes a special drummers' fee to pay the bongo beaters who'll help us lif' up a leg an' trample like the misplaced Brazilian sambistas we know we are.


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