A quarter of a century ago, this was unthinkable. The Royals had just won the World Series, capping off a decade-long stretch in which the team dominated the American League West. It was a young team with a deep farm system, indicating that it might continue winning for years.
Today, though, Royals fans no longer greet the season with hopes of a successful year. Instead, we willingly make an emotional investment in a product that we know is defective. What we buy isn't physically dangerous like lead-based toys or a Toyota, but the product crushes our souls. Year after year, our team loses — not spectacularly, but in a generic, nondescript fashion that transcends simple embarrassment.
Other fans claim to suffer. Cubs fans moan about their "curse," but their team makes the playoffs before succumbing to the inevitable. During their own long championship drought, Red Sox fans documented their October frustrations with long, neurotic books and New Yorker articles. Hollywood celebrated the Cleveland Indians' suffering.
It isn't just that the Royals haven't won a championship in the last 25 years. The team hasn't even come close to appearing in the playoffs. People in Cleveland, Boston and Chicago haven't set aside their home teams or let whole seasons go by without going to a game. Talk never turns to euthanizing the Indians, the Cubs or the Red Sox via "contraction."
We suffer anonymously. Bill Murray doesn't serenade Royals fans during a seventh-inning stretch. The closest we get is Garth Brooks, whose full-moon face appears on the K's Jumbotron to politely lead the crowd in a "Friends in Low Places" sing-along, his song an unintentional anthem for our cellar-dwelling team.
So, as we suffer together with a humor as dark as the Royals' prospects at the All-Star break, take note of these 25 worst moments in the 25 years since Kansas City won the World Series.
25. Felix Martinez
Most of baseball's bench-clearing melees involve a lot of shouted threats but little actual violence. This wasn't the case for shortstop Felix Martinez in 1998. That year, a couple of outbreaks presented rare opportunities for the .214 Martinez to actually hit something. He broke Otis Nixon's jaw in one fight, with a kick to the face, and earned a lengthy suspension after sucker-punching the Angels' Frank Bolick during a second brawl.
24. The Worst Promotion in Royals History
In 1998, baseball's marketing geniuses seized upon an idea that was seemingly the product of a pothead's musings after too many bong hits: Turn Ahead the Clock Day. In a nod to throwback events, most MLB teams played games ostensibly held in 2021. Robots delivered the first pitch and performed the PA duties. Playing Seattle, KC's bullpen blew the game in the late innings, indicating that the future would be much like the present.
23. Collusion
According to John Helyar's book Lords of the Realm, the Royals could have acquired Kirk Gibson right after the 1985 World Series. When Gibson's agent called the Royals, the team wasn't interested. Why? Commissioner Peter Ueberroth urged every team to limit costs, particularly expenditures for the signing of long-term free-agent deals. When no team signed Gibson (among other players), an arbitrator ruled that baseball owners had acted in collusion to manipulate baseball's labor market. From 1986 to 1990, Gibson led two teams to the postseason, won the MVP award, and hit one of history's most memorable home runs.
22. Mark Quinn Lights Up the Night
During the 2001 season, Mark Quinn made 241 consecutive plate appearances in 60 games without drawing an unintentional walk. He finally managed to draw one on September 29 off Mark Buehrle, prompting an unusually derisive Kauffman Stadium crew to set off a fireworks display. Bonus: Quinn was sadly unselective about his off-season activities, missing the beginning of the 2002 season due to injuries sustained while kung-fu fighting his brother.
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Leaving out the death of Dick Howser is excluding the single biggest factor for the nosedive the Royals took. He has not been equaled as a managers since.
Leaving out the death of Dick Howser is excluding the single biggest factor for the nosedive the Royals took. He has not been equaled as a managers since.
I think he was being more than a little ironic about Glass' "awesomeness".
And Glass is nowhere close to being one of the richest owners in baseball.
I think he was being more than a little ironic about Glass' "awesomeness". And Glass is nowhere close to being one of the richest owners in baseball.
Stop making damm excuses! You have probably the richest owner's in baseball. You have to spend money nowadays in order to win , Yes you have Rays, but that is an expection. So stop making fuckin exeuse's. Pipe down.
Yes, the Royals have sucked for a long time, but Jesus H. Christ, did you know you can look up and verify statistics online?
-When the hell did Danny Jackson win the Cy Young? He didn't. He finished a distant second in 1988 to Orel Hershiser.
-Bret Saberhagen won 57 regular-season games after leaving the Royals...in TEN YEARS. He was hurt so much he only averaged ten starts a year for the rest of his career. Sure, Gregg Jefferies sucked, but Sabes was always hurt.
-Kirk Gibson played only one full season from 1986 to 1990--his MVP year with the Dodgers in '88. The Royals acquired him in 1991...for one full season.
-Guillen missed half of last year with injury; he didn't "sit out" the season. It only seemed that way...
-The Royals have had three ROYs since 1985. The third was named Carlos Beltran.
David Glass's ownership has been "awesome"??
I wish I had you filling out my annual performance reviews.
This article is really silly as well unsuseful to hear, IF YOU'RE THAT SO CRITCAL OF YOU'RE ROYALS. Find another dam team! Oh by the way I HEARD you're interview on the B-team and you sounded really fuckin dumb.
For the sake of reference, Ewing Kauffman died in 1993, not 1991, as you said in the Schuerholz entry.
Actually, the top curse came in 2001, when the Royals web designer at the time had a personal website with a countdown to 100 losses. He was nixed, and told at the time "This organization has never lost 100 games. We don't know why you'd ever think such a thing." Soren Petro and others know of the curse of the Countdown to 100 losses. Too bad this story wasn't made public years ago.
Nice article, but definitely missing a few "curses":
The Closer gap from Montgomery until Soria: Ricky Bottalico, Roberto Hernandez, Ambiorix Burgos, all consistently awful. Mike Macdougal (and I really miss using the "Mac the Ninth" nickname un-ironically) and Jeremy Affeldt were better they were merely INconsistently awful. Does anyone realize that if the 2006 Royals - as terrible as they were in so many ways - did nothing but switch Burgos (and others) for a great closer like Soria, they would have been above .500? 31 blown saves! 31 games the Royals terrible lineup and terrible starters handed over to the bullpen in a situation to win, and the bullpen lost it. With a decent closer making, say, 75% of those situations into saves, that's 23 losses that could have been wins - turning a 62-100 team into an 85-77 team! And this goes more so for the good-hitting Royals teams of the late 90's-early 00's.
August 23, 2006 - How does a team have a 10-1 lead after the first inning and still blow the game? The Royals found a way, though. Very much involving the aforementioned bullpen, I might add (though the starter deserves blame here too).
Mistaken identity (which for some reason always seems to involve the Milwaukee Brewers) - Jeff D'Amico pitched for the Royals in 2000. Jeff D'Amico was 12-7 with a 2.66 ERA in 2000. Unfortunately, the latter Jeff D'Amico was pitching for the Brewers, the one the Royals had had a 9.22 ERA, mostly in middle relief. Ryan Braun played for the Royals in 2007. Ryan Braun won the Rookie of the Year award in 2007 and went to the All-Star Game in two years following. Unfortunately, the good Ryan Braun was once again a Brewer, the one who was on the Royals has not been seen in the majors since 2007 and sported an ERA over 6.
New York City's # 1 Royals fan,
Chaim Mattis Keller
Stop making damm excuses! You have probably the richest owner's in baseball. You have to spend money nowadays in order to win , Yes you have Rays, but that is an expection. So stop making fuckin exeuse's. Pipe down.
In regards to Bizarre Injuries, I'd only like to add that I'm pretty sure that Mike Sweeney suffered a neck injury due to a congratulatory pat on the head at one point.
Yes, the Royals have sucked for a long time, but Jesus H. Christ, did you know you can look up and verify statistics online? -When the hell did Danny Jackson win the Cy Young? He didn't. He finished a distant second in 1988 to Orel Hershiser. -Bret Saberhagen won 57 regular-season games after leaving the Royals...in TEN YEARS. He was hurt so much he only averaged ten starts a year for the rest of his career. Sure, Gregg Jefferies sucked, but Sabes was always hurt. -Kirk Gibson played only one full season from 1986 to 1990--his MVP year with the Dodgers in '88. The Royals acquired him in 1991...for one full season. -Guillen missed half of last year with injury; he didn't "sit out" the season. It only seemed that way... -The Royals have had three ROYs since 1985. The third was named Carlos Beltran.
David Glass's ownership has been "awesome"?? I wish I had you filling out my annual performance reviews.
This article is really silly as well unsuseful to hear, IF YOU'RE THAT SO CRITCAL OF YOU'RE ROYALS. Find another dam team! Oh by the way I HEARD you're interview on the B-team and you sounded really fuckin dumb.
For the sake of reference, Ewing Kauffman died in 1993, not 1991, as you said in the Schuerholz entry.
Actually, the top curse came in 2001, when the Royals web designer at the time had a personal website with a countdown to 100 losses. He was nixed, and told at the time "This organization has never lost 100 games. We don't know why you'd ever think such a thing." Soren Petro and others know of the curse of the Countdown to 100 losses. Too bad this story wasn't made public years ago.
Nice article, but definitely missing a few "curses": The Closer gap from Montgomery until Soria: Ricky Bottalico, Roberto Hernandez, Ambiorix Burgos, all consistently awful. Mike Macdougal (and I really miss using the "Mac the Ninth" nickname un-ironically) and Jeremy Affeldt were better they were merely INconsistently awful. Does anyone realize that if the 2006 Royals - as terrible as they were in so many ways - did nothing but switch Burgos (and others) for a great closer like Soria, they would have been above .500? 31 blown saves! 31 games the Royals terrible lineup and terrible starters handed over to the bullpen in a situation to win, and the bullpen lost it. With a decent closer making, say, 75% of those situations into saves, that's 23 losses that could have been wins - turning a 62-100 team into an 85-77 team! And this goes more so for the good-hitting Royals teams of the late 90's-early 00's. August 23, 2006 - How does a team have a 10-1 lead after the first inning and still blow the game? The Royals found a way, though. Very much involving the aforementioned bullpen, I might add (though the starter deserves blame here too). Mistaken identity (which for some reason always seems to involve the Milwaukee Brewers) - Jeff D'Amico pitched for the Royals in 2000. Jeff D'Amico was 12-7 with a 2.66 ERA in 2000. Unfortunately, the latter Jeff D'Amico was pitching for the Brewers, the one the Royals had had a 9.22 ERA, mostly in middle relief. Ryan Braun played for the Royals in 2007. Ryan Braun won the Rookie of the Year award in 2007 and went to the All-Star Game in two years following. Unfortunately, the good Ryan Braun was once again a Brewer, the one who was on the Royals has not been seen in the majors since 2007 and sported an ERA over 6. New York City's # 1 Royals fan, Chaim Mattis Keller
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