Friday, June 22, 2007

Counting by Couliers: Your Bullwinkle-Voiced Guide to a Coulier Weekend

Posted By on Fri, Jun 22, 2007 at 2:35 PM

FRIDAY

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Giant celebrity funnyman and Bullwinkle impersonator Dave Coulier (pictured) performs his inimitable brand of Bullwinkle-imitation-based comedy tonight at Stanford and Son's (1867 Village West Parkway, Kansas City, Kansas) and will be, perhaps, the only man in the city limits who has been seen on television somewhere in the world every single day since, like, 1987. Go experience the cognitive dissonance that can come only from seeing in person a man doing a Bullwinkle impression who, previously, you had seen doing a Bullwinkle impression only on TV. Coulier takes the stage at 7:30 p.m.

Also, it’s Video Game Night at the Kansas City Public Library's Plaza Branch (4801 Main). On the one hand, first-person combat against the xenophobic Covenant seems like a clever ruse to get young people into the library — where they might check out some books or, at the very least, DVDs of movies based on books. On the other hand, Best Buy has been using R. Kelly CDs as loss-leaders for their more lucrative Microsoft Zune sales, so what the hell. The action starts at 5 p.m.

SATURDAY

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Are you having trouble hauling your prospecting equipment, bolts of canvas, nonperishable dry goods and changes of button-flap long-johns across the Rockies? Also, is your name something like “Slappy”? What you need, my crusty old prospector friend, is a good, sturdy burro.

They’re strong, clever and curious. They’re cuter than a baby rhinoceros wearing glasses and trying on his dad’s oversize shoes. Amazing animal husbandry factoid: If a donkey is introduced to a colt and its mother, the colt will often form a bond with the donkey that may last its whole lifetime.

Look: What do I have to do to get you onto this donkey today? At the Missouri State Fairgrounds (2503 West 16th Street, Sedalia) the most awkwardly named federal agency, the Department of Interior, Bureau of Land Management-Eastern States (BLM-ES) holds a special wild-horse and burro adoption. Adoption fees start at $125, and the event takes place between 8 a.m. and 5 p.m.

Also, TV impressionist Dave Coulier will be onstage at Stanford and Son's (1867 Village West Parkway, Kansas City, Kansas) serving up impressions of such cartoon characters as Popeye and Bullwinkle. The show starts at 7:30 p.m.

SUNDAY

Attention, rugged Corporate Woodsmen: There’s a free “Country in the Woods” concert at Corporate Woods Office Park (9711 West 109th Street in Overland Park), starting at 2 p.m. The headliner is Tracy Byrd, with special guests the Drew Davis Band. Candy Coburn opens. Bring blankets and lawn chairs. Don’t bring pets or coolers.

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Then, head on out to Stanford and Son's (1867 Village West Parkway, Kansas City, Kansas) for an edgy, transgressive blast of Bullwinkle impressions from alternative comic Dave Coulier. The controversial Coulier delivers trenchant social criticism, left-wing political satire and shocking comedic free-association. In the voice of Bullwinkle. Catch his show at 7 p.m. tonight.

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