George Brett isn't afraid to admit that he shits his pants. Deadspin linked to the You Tube video from an unknown spring training in which the Kansas City Royals legend farts and then admits he pooped his pants the night before.
"I'm good about twice a year for that," Brett explains without a hint of embarrassment. "When was the last time you shit your pants? Been a while?"
Brett continues with an amazingly detailed story of shitting himself at the Bellagio in Las Vegas while saying "fuck" roughly 47,509 times in three minutes.
The money quote: "The most perfect double-tapered shit of my life. True story," Brett says of the day after. "Who's the pitchers in this game?"
Upon hearing this news, a co-worker asked: "I wonder if he ever shit his pants after he ate at his restaurant?"
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He is a "fucking" disgusting Republican! Folks what do you expect? Jesus Christ.
He is a "fucking" disgusting Republican! Folks do you expect? Jesus Christ.
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I knew all along it wasn�t pine tar on that bat even though he cracked that ball out of the park on me in the 9th. It was his own fecal matter.
(stands up from forward bend) Farted. I shit my pants last night. I did. Went out and had a great meal�just a great fuckin�meal and I had to go to the bathroom so bad in the car. I�m goin� �Travel (sp?) Hurry up man�I gotta shit". I had fuckin� shit in my pants. (cuts off) I�m good twice a year for that. When was the last time you shit your pants?
-Me?!!
-Yeah�been awhile?
-It�s been a long time.
I was in Vegas a couple years ago. This is an honest to god true story. Stayin at the Bellagio. I went over to the Mirage for dinner-met some friends of mine over there. Went to Kokomo�s-great little steakhouse. Guy brings out some fresh crab legs. He says �these just came in I gotta give �em to you guys�. So I�m eatin� �em. Then we go gamble a little bit. Thought I had a tee time early in the morning. So I said �look I gotta get going. I'm walkin' back to the hotel...I get three quarters the way outta the lobby and all the sudden I go �Oh fuck� and I�m standin� here like this. (clinches ass and makes fists) I got my butt pinched so tight. I�m fucked�I can�t move. All the sudden you know... I felt all right y�know I went just like this (makes explosive tidal wave sound)�water.
-No way.
I had food poisoning from the crabs. Take off my leather jacket-tie it around my waist. I�m just standin� there and it�s just runnin� down my leg. I got jeans on, black bucks�no socks. And I just start fuckin� walkin� and every time I�m walkin� somethin�s comin� out�it�s water! Straight fuckin� water!! (whisper) Then�tell ya how sick I was-tell ya how sick I was. Then I�m standing outside I get on my cell phone and I call the guy (distortion) I said �Larry you won�t believe this I�m standing outside the fuckin� Bellagio-I can�t move. I got shit everywhere. I shit all over myself'. And Larry�s about a 48 waist. So he brings me over a pair of pants and some towels�and some towels. So I tell him where I�m standin�. He finds the closest bathroom. When you�re goin� up the escalator-you�re goin� up the�I can�t get in the elevator!! It�s twelve o� clock at night. So he goes and finds the closest bathroom in the lobby of the hotel. And then I get on the escalator and he kinda pretends like he dropped something-so no one gets behind me. Tells me where it is-I go in there. He goes and gets the towel all wet for me. Throws it over the fuckin� stall. I take off all my fuckin� clothes. Just wipe off�leave my shoes, my pants�everything�right there!! The towels�right there in the stall. And I�m walkin� barefoot with my shirt and his pants that are 48-inch waist through the lobby like this (demonstrates) at midnight. Got up in the morning and the most perfect double tapered shit (whatever that means) I�ve ever had in my life. True story!! (To no one in particular without missing a beat) Who�s the pitchers in this game?
My god I cant find that video anywhere someone help me. It helps me get through the day. If anyone knows anywhere I can find it let me know. If anyone has it saved send it to my email. mattburton615@gmail.com
My god I cant find that video anywhere someone help me. It helps me get through the day. If anyone knows anywhere I can find it let me know. If anyone has it saved send it to my email. mattburton615@gmail.com
I wonder whether George Brett shit himself when Nettles kicked George's ass on the ball-field ? ! ? Dumping in his drawers so often may have led George B to rely on Preparation H ! Netlles never shit himself when Nettles set The ML Record of 412 Assists and 54 DPs or when Nettles set The AL Record for Most Career HR for an AL 3rd BaseMan ! Nettles was The 1981 ALCS MVP and Nettles never shit himself in those pressure packed play-offs ! So when Nettles is changing grand-kid diapers he can think that Brett still stinks ! See Graig get great ovations from NY Yankee Fans from 2008 Old Timer Day and from yesterday at The Babe's Bronx BallPark ! Check it out Trivia Fans - 76 was when Nettles led The AL with 32 HR when the runner-up had just 27 (in this steroid era - that would be 64 HR to a runner-up of 54) The 1st year Back To The Bronx (after 74 & 75 were spent at SHEA) Nettles did christen New Yankee Stadium by bringing both The HR Crown and The AL Pennant Back To The Bronx ! Long live The AL Greatest 3rd BaseMan Nettles
Shit! Why didn't I save this? I had just sent the link to everyone I know!
FREE GEORGE BRETT'S STINKY DRAWS!
FREE GEORGE BRETT'S STINKY DRAWS!
FREE GEORGE BRETT'S STINKY DRAWS!
FREE GEORGE BRETT'S STINKY DRAWS!
FREE GEORGE BRETT'S STINKY DRAWS!
Sadly, the video's down. Shortly, however, we'll post a transcript.
Meanwhile, Time Warner Cable has issued this statement about the video:
Time Warner Cable and Metro Sports apologize to the Royals and George Brett for the unauthorized release of video onto the internet. The segment that has been made public was taken from raw footage shot by Metro Sports, 3 or 4 years ago, for the purpose of producing a news segment or program about the Royals. This segment was NEVER used in any programming or news segment by Metro Sports or Time Warner Cable Kansas City.
At this point we have launched an investigation to determine who may have removed this footage from the Metro Sports video archive without authorization. The unauthorized use of the footage and alteration and use of the Metro Sports logo constitutes a violation of copyright and unauthorized use of company property. The person or persons responsible will be fully prosecuted under applicable state and federal law.
it's amazing to me that even though he's george effing Brett the young royals wander away from him in the middle of his awful stories. he sounds like an x-rated grandpa simpson.
Well, this will get those gay rumors going again. People who take it up the ass have more frequent need to go to take a dump and sometimes it's sudden.
I'm just amazed the other guys didn't tell him to shut the F up!; that they didn't want to hear it.
An ENG operator at Metro Sports taped this three years ago and has been passing it around the office on his personal "blooper reel."
I'm really surprised this hasn't gone public before now. The first time it was posted on Youtube, it was done under a new account called "Spruge" with a Metro Sports logo and a mug shot of John Sprugel, a much maligned Metro Sports executive.
Sounds like a disgruntled employee to me. I wouldn't be surprised if the Royals applied a lot more scrutiny when issuing media credentials to Metro Sports next season. At least they already lost the broadcast rights to FSN this year, or they could have lost the production deal for RSTN.
BEST BALL PLAYER STORY I EVER HEARD. WHEN YOU HAVE TO GO, YOU ARE GOING.NO MATER WHERE YOUR AT, TIME OR PLACE. THAT FOR EVERY ONE. NO BRAKS HERE.
BEST BALL PLAYER STORY I EVER HEARD. WHEN YOU HAVE TO GO, YOU ARE GOING.NO MATER WHERE YOUR AT, TIME OR PLACE. THAT FOR EVERY ONE. NO BRAKS HERE.
BEST BALL PLAYER STORY I EVER HEARD. WHEN YOU HAVE TO GO, YOU ARE GOING.NO MATER WHERE YOUR AT, TIME OR PLACE. THAT FOR EVERY ONE. NO BRAKS HERE.
BEST BALL PLAYER STORY I EVER HEARD. WHEN YOU HAVE TO GO, YOU ARE GOING.NO MATER WHERE YOUR AT, TIME OR PLACE. THAT FOR EVERY ONE. NO BRAKS HERE.
BEST BALL PLAYER STORY I EVER HEARD. WHEN YOU HAVE TO GO, YOU ARE GOING.NO MATER WHERE YOUR AT, TIME OR PLACE. THAT FOR EVERY ONE. NO BRAKS HERE.
This is one of the greatest stories I've ever heard. I can't stop watching it...I'm seriously crying.
Amen, George. My worst was just before a job interview. Best cover-up I ever executed.
Well I don't know the exact date but this video would have to be from spring training 2005. That's the only time John Buck, Jose Lima and Tony Pena were all in spring training together.
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