Being For The Benefit of Mr. McCartney: FYI BEATLES FANS, the music industry has been consistently releasing non-Beatles music for the last 40 years, and is probably going to continue doing so in the future! You might look into some. But I assume that there's somebody out there, such as your Nana or smelly old Jimmy Carter, who still cares that they're going to release the first decent digital remasters of all of the Beatles albums since the 1980s. FINALLY! "Being For the Benefit of Mr. Kite" the way it was intended to be heard, just as crappy as the day the Beatles listened to the final mix, sheepishly looked at each other and heaved a tired, collective three-part-harmony fart. Since the digital mastering technology of the 80s was basically the equivalent of smashing mastodon skulls together until a shard broke off that could be used to poke holes in giant sloth hide, there's probably a whole generation out there that hasn't really experienced the full sonic breadth of the ghastly "Being For the Benefit of Mr. Kite," or really any of the overrated garbage from Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band.
Oh, and there's still no word about whether those two remaining dumb old men will ever allow legal digital downloads of Beatles music, as if the whole entire world is poised and waiting for Her Majesty Queen McCartney to smash a bottle of champagne against the H.M.S. Revolver. Fine. Y'know? If you aren't interested in selling your music in a format people actually want in exchange for actual money, I believe I've pointed out before that high-quality digital copies of the entire Beatles catalog are already available on the internet at the extremely competitive price-point of fucking nothing, so it doesn't matter anyway.
Then they'll discontinue rotary dialing: AT&T would very much like permission to stop delivering the white pages phone book in Kansas City and St. Louis, please, since the internet sucked all of the value out of the paper phone books we all used to buy on the newsstand and read on the train. Now if they could stop dumping four Yellow Pages directories per year on my goddamn porch, my whole life would probably be ice cream cones and trade-show hostesses. That's our Western version of "milk and honey," a beverage of extremely questionable deliciousness apparently consumed in the Middle East. I like honey. I sort of like milk, kind of. But somehow, it never crosses my mind to combine the two. I guess that's why God created artificial chocolate-flavored powder made out of corn and packaged with a bunny rabbit mascot who has impulse-control issues.
Anyway, ATTENTION LOCAL BUSINESSES: I do not read the stupid Yellow Pages, ever. Instead, I direct my Netscape Gold browser to the flash-based Website of your restaurant and wait for several long minutes until the opening animation ends, click on MENU, and admire the artistry with which your LOADING animation was designed. Extremely pretty! Then I dine at the restaurant of whichever of your nearest competitors has an HTML-based Website that doesn't try to impress me with its David Lean production values. As a smooth segue to the new Daily Briefs mascot, the Buddha of Douchebags, I'll point out that many sushi restaurants print their menus out in the preferred font of the Buddha of Douchebags, the irritating Papyrus font:
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Wow, you have some seriously crazy readers today. I'm going to go set fire to my Sgt Pepper's album now. Kind of a meaningless gesture, since I've got illegal copies on all of my computers anyway. But still, it's the thought that counts, right?
Dear douche bag, ALL the Beatles albums rock! Your just jealous because you have 0 talent!!
Come on chris.....the last thing Sgt Pepper is, is garbage. If you don't like it fine...it's not my favourite Beatle album either...but you have to at least appreciate the effort. Thank goodness once they got past the Yeah Yeah Yeah stage of their career, they found a way to come up with different ideas with each album....usually less than a year after the last album came out. They released an insane amount of material in less than 10 years together..and though not all of it was great..none of it was garbage. Now, you take that back, or I'm telling my mom on you. ;)
Wow, call me naive, but I would have never expected people to get their panties in a bunch over someone sharing their opinion about the Beatles. Chris Packham, you are my hero.
Dear Mr. Packham:
I have thought for years that it was a shame that the print and on-line critics who shape the reputation of the Beatles and Paul McCartney for the current generation are all possessed of tin ears and wrong heads. Luckily enough, simple exposure to the music is all that's needed to convert a new generation to fandom. The Beatles didn't make their reputation on "Mr. Kite". This was the first of several cheap and inaccurate shots.
Why not find out something about what you write about before you write about it? There is, for instance, a large population of people who won't download free music because they can't see how the musicians get paid if you do that. Are you attempting to stand on the moral high ground of theft? In fact, it's hard to see what you're actually saying at all. Is this really the way you have to write to be successful in the blogsphere? 'Cause if it is, we are in a lot of trouble.
Someone's a Stones fan... More seriously though, McCartney doesn't need more money. If he truly did, the songs would have been posted long ago. Not to mention by the way that Michael Jackson owns about a quarter of the Beatles songs while Sony owns another quarter. Even if Paul wanted his share to be up for download, we'd still not be able to download the other half. Even though people can easily download these songs for free, it doesn't mean that they will. While I can't say that I don't download countless songs, I CAN say that I've bought countless Beatles/Wings albums. You may call them dumb men, but they're a hell of a lot more respected than you are. Think about it. There must be a reason.
And FYI, McCartney knows what the internet is. Just because Beatles songs aren't up for download, doesn't mean his solo stuff is. Think before you post you dumb peace of shit.
Mr. Kovacich, the irony of telling someone to lighten up with such passionate vitriol does not elude me. Nor does the lesson in taste from someone sporting an unironic mullet.
Fuck those flash websites, though I would have thought they loaded just fine on that fancy-pants Netscape Gold browser you have.
Thanks to you, Lovely Rita will be playing in my head for the rest of the day.
I completely agree with you on the white / yellow pages thing -- what a waste! I've got a stack of six in my closet, since I'm lazy to dump them in the recycling bin and haul out to the curb. The only time I've used the phone book in the past 5 years was to order pizza when my electricity was on the fritz (a nice way of saying I forgot to pay my bill one month too many.)
Sorry, Brian, I'm already on record as hating Nickelback. ALSO: I love the Beatles. I would gay-marry each and every one of the Beatles. I just hate Sgt. Pepper, and wish another band, such as a Nickelback or a Complete had recorded it.
Meesha, I'll definitely add phonebook-ripping to my repertoire of feats of strength.
Very hurtful, Mike. But to address your comments: Sure, OK, you love "Being For the Benefit of Mr. Kite." I like "music." For instance? Revolver. Truly great! And available here, if anyone's interested.
not all yellow pages belong to att, I haven't even brought one inside the house for years, they all go straight to trash. you can rip them in half after workouts.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v...
I like Beatles and learned to speak English in part by listening to their songs. That's why I am often mistaken for a British person. who grew up speaking russian. like the guy above me I'd like a public apology and you should be required to listen to 1 hr of Beatles for the next 10 days.
Your "cute" comments on The Beatles just show your desperation to say whatever for attention and oh, you get paid for this ? I think I'll lower myself down to your level and call you a fucking tool if you think Sgt. Pepper is and I quote you, "overrated garbage". You should take your head out of your ass and lighten up a bit. No idea what your music tastes are Chris, I can only imagine but since you do have a public forum to spew your crap, it deserved an abusive response.
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