Kansas City has no shortage of assholes, killers and fat people. It'd be fair to wonder if this was actually hell with all the sinning going on. Thankfully, scientists have finally done something worthwhile and measured everyone's malevolence with brightly colored maps.
According to the Las Vegas Sun, Kansas State University researchers spent a lot of time and public money putting together a group of sin maps measuring the propensity of evil from county-to-county, state-to-state, all across the United States. They grouped them by the seven deadly sins: wrath, lust, gluttony, greed, envy, pride and sloth. They used readily available stats like rate of STD transmission for lust and violent crime for wrath. The good news is that, compared with the rest of the country, Kansas City could be doing a lot worse.
KSU's findings were presented last week at the Association of American Geographers' annual meeting in Vegas. Because geographers love to roll them bones.
You can check out maps of the country here, with a different map for every sin in the study. Missouri avoids being a modern-day Sodom for the most part, with the exception of St. Louis, which sneaks in the top 10 for each vice.
As for KC, we expected Jackson County to be the worst in the metro, but turns out it's Cass County that's full of greedy, murderous adulterers. So if you live in Cass County, you're going to hell. Probably.
(photo credit: www.adpulp.com)
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