Just after they moved into their new place near the intersection of Brush Creek Boulevard and Gillham Road last summer, Nate Charlson and Tami Meccan were unloading some groceries from their car. Their infant daughter was still strapped in as they hoisted out the Costco bags. All of a sudden, in jumped a giant raccoon.
"It had to be 50 pounds," Charlson says. "It was the size of a dog. I've never seen anything like it."
Fearing for his daughter's safety, Charlson grabbed at the indignant animal. The raccoon was unimpressed. Charlson started kicking at it, wearing nothing but a pair of Addidas slippers. "I probably could have lost a foot," he says. "It sneered at me and finally jaunted away. It wasn't afraid of people."
Charlson and his neighbors spent the summer months under attack. Now, the current heat wave is raising concerns of a second strike.
For Charlson's family, last summer was like a bad horror flick. Their nemesis? Raccoons that Charlson swears were two feet tall, disturbingly clever and "mean as shit."
The invasion of the giant raccoons started with the death of Charlson's fish. "They ate all my Asian goldfish in the pond out back," he says.
Then the raccoons went aerial. "One tried to push through the screen in the upstairs window and come inside," Charlson says.
Sometimes they succeeded at getting inside the human perimeter. One night, Charlson says, he was unpacking some boxes in the garage, wearing nothing but shorts and sandals, when one of the tricky bastards cornered him. "I'm yelling at it, thinking God knows what kind of diseases it has," he says. "I try to spear it on the back with a grill knife, and it bends the knife. I mean, you've got to have a military-grade weapon."
It got so bad, Charlson says, that Meccan was too scared to go outside at night and smoke a cigarette for fear of the black-and-white bandits. The whole neighborhood colluded to starve them out. "We kept the trash inside and didn't put it out until the truck was coming," Charlson says. "We made a concerted effort with our neighbors to not leave anything outside that they could eat."
Nothing seemed to work. Charlson called the city but was told there was nothing that could be done about it. Dennis Gagnon, spokesman for Kansas City's Public Works Department, confirms that the city deals only with dead animals. For live critters, citizens are referred to the Missouri Department of Conservation.
Charlson called several private companies, but they charged more than $500 for their services. Luckily, once the summer started to fade and the temperatures started to drop, the giant raccoons retreated. But now that the heat is on, Charlson and his neighbors are worried about "Attack of the Giant Raccoons, Part II."
"We haven't seen them yet," Charlson says. "But they'll be back."
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Our house sits at the top of a hill, so there's an elevated deck in the back. We have a cat door in the door that leads out onto the deck so our cats can get some air without braving the streets.
I have to block the cat door at night or the raccoons will come in through it and eat up all the catfood. It took several attempts to figure a way to block the door so they couldn't get through - the little bastards are indeed smarter than most critters and quite adept with those hand-like paws.
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