Bird Fleming is an avid salsa dancer who, when he's not busy pursuing higher education at the University of Missouri-Kansas City, also teaches lessons at the City in Motion dance studio. When I interviewed him for this week's feature story ("The Politics of Dancing"), he offered some examples of the advice he gives his students -- things to know to avoid cutting a fellow dancer's ego when they're out cutting a rug.
He warns his female students about Salsa Mack Daddies, the ones who are there to score more than just a twirl on the dance floor. Upon hearing this, he says, his female students usually ask how they're supposed to know the difference between a dancer and a date-seeker.
"Come on, now, you're a woman, you know," he says. "Especially when they come up to you with a drink in their hand, Hey baby, wanna dance? Or if they want to buy you a drink. And they're not a good dancer. And then they want your number."
A real dancer will have patience with their partner, regardless of his or her level of experience, Fleming says. "They don't have to ask you your level, and you don't have to tell them. By the first two or three moves, they'll know your level and they will not take you any further than that.
"Guys who are there to pick up will try to out-dance you," he continues. "They'll sling you all over the place, whip you all around. That's not a dancer. There's a common thing in salsa etiquette: Salsa is designed for the man to make the woman look good."
Some more tips for men and women: If you refuse a partner for a dance, you can't dance with the next person that asks during that same song. "You have to wait the song out," Fleming says. Also, "You should never stop in the middle of a number, regardless of how bad the dancer is."
Check out further reading on dance floor etiquette here.
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