Jason Whitlock is leaving The Kansas City Star "to pursue other interests."
The Star made the announcement on its website at 11:33 p.m. So ends Whitlock's 16-year career at the local daily. Not that the end didn't appear to be near. Whitlock hasn't written a Star column since May 26, but he has been firing off copy for Fox Sports and this flame-thrower for The Big Lead.
This is all pretty bizarre. Back on June 22, Star reader rep Derek
Donovan wrote a blog titled "Jason Whitlock will
return," and pinky swore that Whitlock was just "taking some
personal time off, but will return. He hasn't set a
date yet that I'm aware of."
Someone at the Star clearly
told Donovan that Whitlock would be back. Not sure why'd they do such a
thing if Whitlock wasn't clearly in the fold. You don't risk the
reputation of the paper's go-between with the readers.
But let's
face it. Whitlock always did his best and most creative work for Fox
Sports. You can't peep
through a keyhole at Erin Andrews at the Star. The stodgy
daily wouldn't have allowed lessons about the perils of "strange
tang" and "pussy galore." Or the difference between a "stuffed
onion" and an "oozing pumpkin."
The Grimace-shaped
columnist really let
us in over the years at Fox Sports. That's where we really got to
know him. How else would we know that he's "disease-free, still
employed in this economy and potty-trained -- for the most part." At
least he was in May 2009.
The Star's sports page wouldn't
allow him to share about his love life. He's a man who loves good June
to December
romances (FYI ladies: We're in the middle of his
gardening season). No, really.
"A blossoming May flower
certainly could be
fertilized into a special, 28-year-old bouquet by a patient and
attentive gardener," Whitlock overshared. And here's a one-up for the
ladies. Date Whitlock and you may just get your cellphone bill or car
note paid -- and your nails done!
Just know that Whitlock
believes his former pay grade entitles
him to "a mistress he can see weekly and every other weekend, a
10-day, $15,000 vacation with his mistress, a $1,500-a-month,
fully-furnished apartment for his mistress and seven strip club nights
with his boys."
Damn. Leaving the Star actually could be the best thing for J-Dub. More strange tang, please.
Showing 1-6 of 6
pitch, please post more strippers with or without JW.
The Star has to be one of the worst newspapers. They lost 2 of the top sports writers in the nation in 1 year. Kansas City just became smaller (literally and figuratively) with the loss of JW. The Star will not make it another 5 years without filing bankruptcy. Mcclatchey stock is in the toilet and we know the star is one big hemorrhaging wound on their books.
From JW's "flame-thrower" for The Big Lead:
My criticism will not be classy or subtle.
Really? Who'd have suspected?
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