For years, we've searched for a chink in St. Louis Cardinal manager Tony La Russa's impenetrable armor of evil. When he joined Glenn Beck's "Restoring Honor" rally this August we despaired. When he backed the tea party and Arizona's racial profiling, we wept. This was not a man, but the remorseless troll of America's favorite past time.
But finally a weakness appears! Could La Russa's love of small furry mammals be his exposed white underbelly?
La Russa is appearing in commercials to support Proposition B -- a campaign to stop puppy mills and backed by the Humane Society.
"Thousands of dogs are crammed into small and filthy cages for their entire lives at these large scale puppy mills," La Russa says in the commercial, speaking in the unsettling calm tone of a someone divorced from all human emotion. "No responsible pet owner would ever treat an animal like that. It's cruel, it's inhumane, and we need to change it."
Experts have speculated that this public admission may have finally made La Russa vulnerable to silver bullets and wooden stakes, but who wants to test that theory?
There's been a large conservative Republican opposition to Prop B, arguing that the measure would put breeders out of business and that we should concentrate on enforcing existing laws rather than writing new ones.
Several Missouri residents have expressed concern that this is simply a ruse, a larger scheme in an as yet undetected plan by La Russa to finally cloak the world in a shroud of limitless sorrow. We simply can't know, people.
Check out the ad, and judge for yourself.
H/T Riverfront Times.