In the fevered dreams of Kansas City sports fans, former Kansas City Chiefs offensive coordinator Charlies Weis left us because of some epic behind-the-scenes battle with head coach Todd Haley. In my version, Haley plays unrelenting punch buggy on all away games. Doesn't Haley seem like the kind of guy who would've tortured people in college with punch buggy? Not that it would hurt, just that he'd keep doing it until it drove you crazy, like Chinese water torture.
Also, in my version, Weis sounds just like George C. Scott and keeps growling at Haley to stop hitting him in the goddamn arm already, while Haley scampers away giggling.
But as it turns out, the real reason Weis left is because of one crappy Parkville bus company.
In a recent CBS Sports story, Weis recounted how not one, but two separate incidents of bad mass transit led him to flee Missouri for warmer climes.
Here's the notable excerpt of how the Parkville bus service lost Weis' 15-year-old daughter, Hannah, who also has special needs, and who the Weis family believed could be safely bused back from camp:
There was a bit of concern, but the parents were assured their daughter would be dropped off at 12:27 p.m.So next season, if the Chiefs don't make it to the playoffs and you think it's because the offense has gone to hell, don't blame Haley. Instead, let's find that bus driver and show him or her how reasonable a pack of disappointed NFL fans can be.
By 3 o'clock that day, she hadn't shown up."We're out riding around town looking for her," Weis said. "We're about ready to call the cops. So I'm pissed. I go in [to the school] the next day."
There were apologies and assurances all around. Then it happened again later in thesummer as the Chiefs were breaking camp moving from St. Joseph, Mo., back to Kansas City. School for Hannah had started. She was supposed to be home at 2:45 p.m. At 5 p.m., there was still no Hannah.
"So we did call the cops," Weis said. "There was no explanation. I called the school and said, 'I want everyone there tomorrow morning, 9 o'clock. This is two instances.' My wife wanted to move back right then. It was already over for her. Forget about anything that happened after that."
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Your explanation makes complete and total sense. I retract my accusation, and give kudos to you.
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