Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Charlie Weis left the Kansas City Chiefs because of a shitty Parkville bus company

Posted by Peter Rugg on Tue, Mar 29, 2011 at 7:00 AM

click to enlarge Charlie Weis just wants two things: a decent offensive line and reliable bus service.
  • Charlie Weis just wants two things: a decent offensive line and reliable bus service.

In the fevered dreams of Kansas City sports fans, former Kansas City Chiefs offensive coordinator Charlies Weis left us because of some epic behind-the-scenes battle with head coach Todd Haley. In my version, Haley plays unrelenting punch buggy on all away games. Doesn't Haley seem like the kind of guy who would've tortured people in college with punch buggy? Not that it would hurt, just that he'd keep doing it until it drove you crazy, like Chinese water torture.

Also, in my version, Weis sounds just like George C. Scott and keeps growling at Haley to stop hitting him in the goddamn arm already, while Haley scampers away giggling.

But as it turns out, the real reason Weis left is because of one crappy Parkville bus company.



In a recent CBS Sports story, Weis recounted how not one, but two separate incidents of bad mass transit led him to flee Missouri for warmer climes.

Here's the notable excerpt of how the Parkville bus service lost Weis' 15-year-old daughter, Hannah, who also has special needs, and who the Weis family believed could be safely bused back from camp:

There was a bit of concern, but the parents were assured their daughter would be dropped off at 12:27 p.m.

By 3 o'clock that day, she hadn't shown up.

"We're out riding around town looking for her," Weis said. "We're about ready to call the cops. So I'm pissed. I go in [to the school] the next day."

There were apologies and assurances all around. Then it happened again later in the

summer as the Chiefs were breaking camp moving from St. Joseph, Mo., back to Kansas City. School for Hannah had started. She was supposed to be home at 2:45 p.m. At 5 p.m., there was still no Hannah.


"So we did call the cops," Weis said. "There was no explanation. I called the school and said, 'I want everyone there tomorrow morning, 9 o'clock. This is two instances.' My wife wanted to move back right then. It was already over for her. Forget about anything that happened after that."

So next season, if the Chiefs don't make it to the playoffs and you think it's because the offense has gone to hell, don't blame Haley. Instead, let's find that bus driver and show him or her how reasonable a pack of disappointed NFL fans can be.

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Comments (6)

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Kansas Voter, you and me need to tie one on sometime.

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Posted by Peter Rugg on 03/30/2011 at 1:18 PM

Your explanation makes complete and total sense. I retract my accusation, and give kudos to you.

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Posted by Kansas_Voter on 03/30/2011 at 9:40 AM

the bus driver must of been from oakland or denver

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Posted by Cade Carpenter on 03/29/2011 at 7:00 PM

I feel Haley is more Punch Buggy than Slug Bug. I stand by my journalism.

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Posted by Peter Rugg on 03/29/2011 at 1:48 PM

Hard to believe that that anyone would say anything so disgusting - but it is written by a "Kansas Voter."

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Posted by Joanie on 03/29/2011 at 11:46 AM

"Punch Buggy"? What are you, a 3 year-old girl? The game is called Slug Bug. Also, who lets their retarded child ride the bus alone? That's bad parenting right there.

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Posted by Kansas_Voter on 03/29/2011 at 11:01 AM
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