Subject: Facebook Inc.

• Two Things That Don't Go Together: the Suspect and the Sketch

  April 1, 2008

• Conscientious Style

  March 19, 2009

• Daily Briefs: JUST ONE MOMENT OF YOUR TIME PLEASE!!

  July 28, 2008

• Daily Briefs: Sarcasm through punctuation, John McCain, a weird KMBC omission

  July 29, 2008

• Daily Briefs: The crucifixion that goes CRUNCH

  July 30, 2008

• Daily Briefs in Brief: Brad Hugs Twins to His Bare Chest

  July 31, 2008

• Daily Briefs in Brief: The 2008 Sparkle Olympiad

  August 8, 2008

• Daily Briefs: The heart, brains and sexy bare midriff of Kansas City media

  August 20, 2008

• The Ultimate Summer-Fall Seasonal Changeover Song

  September 9, 2008

• Daily Briefs: David Foster Wallace Has a Posse

  September 15, 2008

• Daily Briefs: Don't Believe the MAX.

  ¿De que color es el autobus? Back when the thinly budgeted Kansas City Transportation Authority started the MAX express line from the City Market to Waldo, there was a lot of talk about the magickal properties that distinguished it from, for instance, the smelly old 57 line your grandparents are always going on about between defibrillations. One of the more fanciful Tolkien-grade claims about the MAX route was that sensors on downtown traffic lights could detect the buses and hold a yellow ligh

  December 11, 2008

• Daily Briefs: Europe: The Forgotten Continent

  Secret society: I have got to become a "Hallmark Hipster," you guys. There's nothing that says "hipster" like Our Special Thoughts On the Occasion of Your 10th Wedding Anniversary. Unfortunately, my application to this very exclusive social networking site was rejected, just like my applications to the Georgetown University Alumni Association, Curves and the Heritage Foundation, so basically I'm still just a misunderstood outsider drifting from town to town with no visible means of support, hel

  December 12, 2008

• Daily J. Briefs, Esq.

  For various reasons, I've become incredibly familiar with the principles of Pavlovian conditioning and their utility in training people, I mean dogs, to perform simple tasks. So the AMAZING REWARD at the end of today's Daily Briefs should not be construed as a "prize" for reading the whole thing, but rather as a conditioned reinforcer that will increase the likelihood of similar behavior in the future. Furthermore, telling you in advance that today's entry has an AMAZING REWARD at the end shoul

  December 15, 2008

• Daily Briefs: In which TV shows are dismissively encapsulated as drinking games

  ARE YOU READY FOR SOME CHIEFSBALL? While I was messing around with the hobbit name generator, I heard on the radio that someone named "Carl Peterson" (hobbit name: Popo Sandydowns) has resigned from his position as first-base coach for the Kansas City Chiefs ball club. Now who will smack the butts of the point guards while they wait in the on-deck circle? I guess they'll have to hire somebody. ATTENTION LADIES: I don't know much about sports, but I have enormous hands, and I can palm a basketba

  December 16, 2008

• Daily Briefs: The Jorge Luis Borges of video game writing

  Zombies of Spain: Back in 2005 when I was a bartender, the company I now work for, Village Voice Media, advertised their opening for a video game columnist. Not only am I an avid gamer, I am THE BEST at writing, according to my stepmom, Linda, who has known me since I was five and is therefore in a position to judge. I wanted to be the Jorge Luis Borges of video game writing, because you know what the world needs? A Jorge Luis Borges of video game writing. So I wrote up the two sample columns t

  December 17, 2008

• Daily Briefs: Who is this Nikki Finke you speak of?

  I hope you've all been enjoying Nikki Finke's Deadline Hollywood over the last couple of days! We don't know what's going on there. It's kind of like the Pitch blog is haunted by juicy, but very spoo-oooky Hollywood scoopage. Consequently, I wasn't going to write anything this morning. "Let Nikki Finke do it," I said to Justin, lazily scratching my stomach with one hand while shoveling a fistful of Combos Pizzeria pretzel snacks into my mouth with the other. "Is there any way to get our site

  December 18, 2008

• Daily Briefs in Brief: No time for blogging

  Since there's nobody I love more than readers of Daily Briefs except for my puppy and my girlfriend IN THAT ORDER, I wanted to express my thanks and gratitude with a traditionally indifferent e-card at absolutely no cost to myself. Obviously, this card would have been my first choice, but unfortunately the American Greetings card company's brain has GONE COMPLETELY INSANE, and they actually charge a subscription fee if you want to send personalized Flash e-cards to your contacts list. So, MERRY

  December 19, 2008

• Daily Briefs: Kansas City, I love you, but you're bringing me down...

  ☃☃☃ HAPPY HOLIDAYS AND A WIENER-SHRINKINGLY FREEZING NEW YEAR!☃☃☃ This has been Daily Briefs with the Pitch inaccu-weather forecast. The pipes froze up in my house yesterday, but the projected temperatures for later in the week are up in the 20s. That's pretty good! As a measure of how far we've lowered our standards, I thought Garrison Keillor was pretty funny this weekend, with that ketchup commercial or Powdermilk Biscuits song, or jokes about English majors or whatever. I guess

  December 22, 2008

• The Daily Briefs Holiday Special

  Blah blah capital markets, blah blah business writing: So, apparently the U.S. recession began last December? Wow, that was such a long time ago, how the years fly by. Why, I can remember back before there was any such thing as habeus corpus, but you kids have it so great these days with your Magna Carta and your Beatles and all your butt-sex, OW, MY HIP! Oh, sweet, sweet Ensure adult formula, now available in pudding form, flood these old bones with lactose-free, gluten-free calories and prote

  December 24, 2008

• Daily Briefs: White men do the BEST imitations of black men

  The jokes of comedy: What have we learned this year? For one thing, we learned that a joke whose punchline is "Lipstick!!!" is always way funnier and more handicapped-accessible if you point to your lipstick when you tell it. Men: This also works for jokes about cocks. Nothing enhances a joke like a helpful little pantomime, or, in the case of saggy old Robin Williams, who looks like he recently opened the Ark of the Covenant, making parenthetical non-sequiturs in the voices of a faith-healing

  December 29, 2008

• Missouri Matters: Missouri politics' Facebook

  Forget Facebook and MySpace, Missouri political junkies. Scooter Jackson, the man behind the not-at-all-Republican Missouri Political News Service, has started a social networking site for Missouri politicos called Missouri Matters. So far, 163 people have signed up. Hey, who wouldn't want to be friends with Matt Blunt's former chief-of-staff Ed Martin (pictured)? Except for maybe, Scott Eckersley. But at least that whole e-mail lawsuit is finally settled.

  January 6, 2009

• Would you sacrifice a friend for one Whopper

  One month after Burger King launched its somewhat-offensive whopper virgins commercials, it's come up with another out-there idea.It's a Facebook application called Whopper Sacrifice and the premise is simple: Defriend 10 people on the social site and Burger King will give you one whopper. That works out to about a half-bite of burger for every friend. Before you think, "I have a bunch of extra friends and they'll never find out": Burger King tells each person you defriend that you "sacrificed"

  January 9, 2009

• Breakfast Buffet: Thursday, 1/15

  Well that didn't take long, Burger King's Facebook application, the Whopper Sacrifice, has been shutdown gutted by Facebook. [Inside Facebook]An in-depth story on France's most famous and influential food critic: François Simon. [NYT]In recessions people drift towards comfort foods (a.k.a unhealthy but good-tasting). So naturally scientists are trying to change it so consumers will drift to healthy foods. [AP Food Science]I know the temperature is hovering somewhere near absolute zero but it's

  January 15, 2009

• Another argument for thrift store shopping

  I got a text message on New Year's Eve from a friend who showed up to a party wearing the same dress as another friend. The matchy-matchy event was "a disaster," according to the text, which I thought was a pretty ridiculous exaggeration. Apparently I underestimated a serious matter, because some chick named Sacha Nana (really?) in Fairway created a whole Web site about it, called That'sMyDress.

  January 22, 2009

• Twinks, bears and guerrilla gays will invade your favorite bar on March 13

  Someone suggested a "friend" to me on Facebook this morning. Guerrilla GayBar isn't really a friend, though. Nor is it a bar. It's a new event in which a bunch of gay men, women and their friends invade one of "the coolest straight bars" in Kansas City on the second Friday of the month. The first invasion is set to occur on March 13. To get in on the action, head to guerrillagaybarkc.com. You have to sign up there to know what straight gathering to crash a week from Friday.

  March 4, 2009

• Names of laid-off Star staffers trickling out

  The mood at The Kansas City Star is sour and grim. The future is both certain and uncertain for the unlucky ones whose numbers were called. The names of the laid-off reporters continue to trickle out -- telling friends or posting status updates on Facebook. Gone are City Hall reporter DeAnn Smith, books editor John Mark Eberhart and the hardworking Ward Triplett. Chopped to part time are movie critic Robert Butler and deputy features editor Carol Powers. Columnist Mike Hendricks lost a third of

  March 16, 2009

• Do you know your cooking personality?

  Flickr: karindalziel No, the photo is not my kitchen. I'm too much of a fussy Virgo to let my sink area get that cluttered. Although there are times when I've been cooking for a large gathering that it's looked nearly that chaotic because I can get easily flustered. What kind of cook am I? That's a good question. This week, Tara Parker-Pope ran a quiz in the New York Times about cooking personalities. If you want so see how your cooking personalty falls into one of the five distnict types,

  March 18, 2009

• Jason Whitlock is out of ideas

  Breast man (and Kansas City Star columnist) Jason Whitlock is whoring for column ideas on his Facebook page. Oh, God. We're in for some shitty columns. The inspiration of his Facebook friends isn't enough for Whitlock -- he wants angles. Why don't they just write the column for him? Hey, Jason. How much you paying for ideas?

  April 14, 2009

• Facebooked

  The Star’s wanna-be Hemingway enters the digital age. Will you be his friend?

  September 11, 2008

• Wanted

  June 26, 2008

• Use Your Imagination

  May 15, 2008

• Killa City: Relative allegedly kills owner of Odessa gas station

  A relative allegedly killed the owner of a BP gas station in Odessa, KMBC Channel 9 reports. The shooting victim is 28-year-old Nurali "Nick" Bhimani, and the suspected shooter is 42-year-old Nasruddin N. Dhanani, who was also found dead at the scene, KMBC says. Here's the report: Nurali BhimaniA call reporting the shooting at the BP, 404 West Highway 40, came in to 911 at around 2:15 p.m. KMBC says police heard gunshots when they arrived at the store. The motive for the shooting isn't known ye

  May 5, 2009

• More jobs! If you like wine and have a video camera, Murphy Goode will pay you 10K per month

  Many of you Twitter (as does Fat City) or are on Facebook or both. I know this because I follow a decent number of readers and know many of you have the talent to get paid to Tweet and send Facebook pokes all day. Especially when the salary is $10,000 a month and includes transportation as well as a "deluxe private home" in Sonoma County.That's the offer Murphy Goode Winery of California is making to find the right candidate for its "Really Goode Job." It wants a person who can use social media

  May 26, 2009

• Nothing to see here folks. Rockstar Energy drink is in no way connected with Michael Savage.

  Did you know that Michael Savage's son is the founder of the popular Rockstar Energy drinks? You didn't? Well that's the way the radio shock-jock (to put it nicely) wants it to be. Savage is using legal means to silence Web sites and even Facebook groups publicizing the connection."Savage Nation" holds the third-largest radio audience in the country. Just to be clear, Michael Savage (real name Michael Weiner) has no connection to Rockstar. Even though his son is the founder and CEO and even thou

  June 9, 2009

• Needmore Discs is closing.

  Erik and Colleen Voeks announced on Facebook this morning that their record store in Shawnee, Needmore Discs, will be shutting its doors for good on August 2. Thanks to Robert Moore for passing along the note. July 3rd is Needmore Discs six year anniversary, and six years is a pretty fair innings. Right? We've had some good times. Sold a bunch of CDs and records. Met some awesome people. Paid the bills. But as George once sang "All things must pass" and "all things" includes Needmore Discs. The

  July 1, 2009

• All That Jazmin

  July 9, 2009

• Festival of Words

  August 6, 2009

• File it under 'I' for ice cream

  ​Bookworms unite! A new Facebook group "People for a library-themed Ben & Jerry's flavor!" boasts more than 6,400 members. Among those who want to see book-inspired ice cream flavors, the top entries so far are the "Gooey Decimal System" (dark fudge alphabet letters with caramel swirls in hazelnut ice cream), "In the Stacks" (butter pecan with fudge swirl), and "Library Loan Shark" (butter rum with little butter-flavored sharks). The New Yorker has come up with several flavors to add to th

  August 6, 2009

• A step backwards for General Caldwell's mil-blogging plans?

  Lt. Gen. William B. Caldwell​A story on Wired's website a week ago outlined how a Department of Defense "warning order" solicited feedback on a potential ban on the use of social media sites like Twitter and Facebook by military personnel. Such a ban seemingly would fly in the face of efforts by Lt.General William B. Caldwell, who oversees the Army's Command and General Staff College on the U.S. Army Combined Arms Center in Fort Leavenworth, Missouri. Caldwell recently ordered every officer at

  August 7, 2009

• The Pitch Music Showcase Videos

  Our friend John Kreicbergs of Patchchord.com was kind enough to resume his role as showcase videographer. This year, he captured hot footage of six of the night's acts. Enjoy.

  August 10, 2009

• Nuthatch-47's latest viral video asks the eternal question...

  "Have you ever been drunk as [beep] and got pulled over?" That's the question posed in a new joint from local musicians and viral video makers Nuthatch-47. "DUI Song" isn't quite as strong as "Facebook Instructions Manual," but it's good for a few honest chuckles. And, besides, who else in the scene is doing this? In addition to the two already mentioned, the 'hatch has also had us in stitches with "Russian Gangster's Grandma," the "Cat Song", "Bad Economy," and "Superstore Clerk." The only

  September 3, 2009

• Breakfast Buffet: Friday, September 11

  Get a bit adventurous with zucchini-ginger bread -- it's a tastier way to get your servings of vegetables. [Simmer Till Done]A review of seven locally available pumpkin ales -- welcome to fall. [The Wort Hog Beer Blog]$83 million. That's the going rate for a master cheese grader's nose, based on the insurance policy taken out by Wyke Farms, a cheese manufacturer in England. [UPI]Sometimes we use our methods of instant communication to do good. A group in Los Angeles is using Twitter and Faceboo

  September 11, 2009

• Stream the Flaming Lips' Embryonic

  Making like it's NPR, the Colbert Nation will be streaming the Flaming Lips' new album, Embryonic, from now until midnight on September 21. ​Surprisingly, when you go the website, there's not a lot of hullabaloo over the preview stream. There's no banner screaming "EXCLUSIVE" or anything like that. It's just a small player in the upper left-hand corner. As many Facebook updates as they've released about this (making it a pretty big deal, really), you'd think it'd be more obvious. Frankly,

  September 17, 2009

• Sebelius taking health insurnace reform questions at 2:45 p.m.

  Kathleen Sebelius​Health and Human Services Secretary and former Kansas Gov. Kathleen Sebelius will be taking questions about health insurance reform at 2:45 p.m. today (although they seem to be running late). Feel free to chat her and Sen. Patty Murray of Washington state up. Watch live here -- or follow the stream after the jump -- and toss 'em questions on Facebook.

  October 14, 2009

• On Running A Small Label

  John Wilkes Booth Records doesn't even have a proper website, but they've managed to get interviewed by the Examiner on how a small label works. The interview presents a nice, short portrait of how most small labels operate. ​The focus on promotion through various social networking sites and "making sure people know the record exists" is fairly useful. It's amazing how many tiny labels I've discovered over the past few years because of Facebook, Twitter, MySpace, and bulletin boards. Thes

  October 19, 2009

• Ex-coach posed as girl on Facebook to get nude photos of boys

  ​A former Johnson County coach pleaded guilty today to one count of producing child pornography. Michael T. Cowley, a 38-year-old Shawnee man, admitted that he posed as a 19-year-old girl named "Ashley" on Facebook and traded a photo of a naked girl that he found on the Internet to young boys in exchange for nude photos of the boys. Oh, and he tried to convince them to engage "in sexual activities," too.Prosecutors say Cowley was an employee of the Olathe School District, teaching a computer c

  October 21, 2009

• An etiquette guide for your unborn son

  ​Once you get an idea of how things ought to be, it's hard to stop thinking about it. And as documentary filmmaker Walker Lamond started to think about the kind of son he would want to raise, he began to offer pithy advice via a blog he called "1001 Rules For My Unborn Son." The blog -- a collection of music, aphorisms and photos -- gained a following and, as these things do, morphed into a book that is set to be released on October 27. The idea was to help create a set of rules that embodied

  October 22, 2009

• A Riverboat Gambler needs your help

  We've got a soft spot for awesome musicians in need at the Wayward Blog, and few are as awesome or as in need as Ian MacDougall, guitarist for the Riverboat Gamblers, a band from Austin that's a favorite here in KC. Ian was hit by a car while riding his bike last Saturday and spent two days in the ICU. He's out of the ICU but is still hospitalized and is in for a long recovery: lots of tests, lots of therapy and LOTS OF BILLS. Jump over to the Help Ian Tumblr page to find out more details and

  October 22, 2009

• New Steddy P. video: "No Matter How"

  Man, the hip-hop scene is putting all other camps of local music TO SHAME these days as far as videos (and, by extension, actually enjoyable online self-promotion) goes. Peep Steddy's P's new one, "No Matter How," from his Style Like Mind album. We gave the album a not at all bad review a couple weeks ago, but it wasn't good enough for commenter Kevin from Colorado Springs, who called it the "most disorientating, unfocused, ignorant display of writing" he's "EVER" seen. And then he went on to g

  October 29, 2009

• Tonight: "Nineties Night" at the Pistol, starring Batrider

  Grunge, an infectiously rockin' disease that originated with flannel-clad chimpanzees in Africa and spread through male primate ululating in the nightclubs of Seattle, is still alive and raging in the undergrounds of the USA. Batrider, a New Zealand band that fully embraces its grunge affliction, is headlining a show tonight at the Pistol Social Club, and, holy cow, look at this nice flier! (That probably could be a good contender for Flier of the Week, but I'll leave the choosing of that up

  November 3, 2009