This is the actual title of a press release sent to the media today from Sony BMG. (Thanks for the all-caps, you guys.)
BARRY MANILOW REIGNS AS THE HIGHEST SINGLE-HOUR MUSIC SALES EVENT IN QVC
HISTORY
The short of it: Manilow went on QVC to preview his upcoming CD, The Greatest Songs of the Seventies, and sold 40,000 of those fuckers. That's the worst mass misallocation of funds since the Iraq War.
Oh, well, however big a cheese sausage Barry Manilow is, at least no one has ever died from his music. That we know of.
No danger to national security; no boon to national sanity.
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Mandy's just as bitter as I am about that womanizing cad, Barry Manilow, but sometimes we gotta cowgirl up and face the facts: butterflies are free to fly where they may, and Barry Manilow will rest his cock wherever he pleases.
You know, he's pretty righteous after all. Check this out from IMDB.com:
Manilow Cancels Appearance on 'The View'
Legendary singer Barry Manilow has canceled a scheduled appearance on TV show The View, because he dislikes co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck. The mild-mannered singer was scheduled to appear on the daytime show on Tuesday to promote his new covers album, The Greatest Songs of The Seventies. But Manilow pulled out of the show, after stating he finds right-wing host Hasselbeck "dangerous and offensive" and strongly disagrees with her "conservative views." In a statement, Manilow says, "I strongly disagree with her views. I think she's dangerous and offensive. I will not be on the same stage as her... I cannot compromise my beliefs." He adds, "I had made a request that I be interviewed by co-hosts Joy Behar, Barbara Walters or Whoopi Goldberg, but not Elisabeth Hasselbeck. Unfortunately, the show was not willing to accommodate this simple request, so I bowed out."
Y'know what I like to call Barry Manilow? BARELY MANENOUGH! HAHAHAHAHAHA!
And then my bowtie spins around.
No, seriously, why you be hatin' on the Barry Manilow? I suppose you'd rather be listening to a barbershop quartet -- that's what you like, isn't it? My Wild Irish Rose, and Let Me Call You Sweetheart. I can totally tell by the way you wear those arm suspenders that old-timey bartenders used to wear, and your handlebar mustache. Plus the neck tattoo that says, "SWEET ADELINE FO-EVAH."
Hoo, boy. I needed a laugh. Thanks to everyone who contributed to this thread, especially Mandy, Chronic and dear Mary O'Reilly.
This is actually looking like a great album. Here is a preview before it hits the streats Tuesday.
Barry Manilow Greatest Songs of the Seventies Media Player
I totally agree,AU. It is refreshing to understand every word he is saying without one swear word.
Barry Manilow isn't the wholesome crooner he leads the world to believe. Some thirty years ago, I met him on a Carribean Cruise that I attended with my widowed mother. He wooed me with many a banana dacquiri and then took my virginity.
"Oh, Mandy, you kissed me and stopped me from shaking," he purred.
I thought we were going to get married and spend the rest of our lives together. Not long after Barry introduced me to the ways of lovemaking, he seduced my mother and then proceeded to bang all the chorus girls in the Cruise's glitzy and butter-drenched song and dance show, "Crab Legs and Cabaret Hits."
On top of all of this, Barry Manilow gave me chlamydia.
Comfort food indeed.
Whoever LW is, AMEN. I can't believe that after thirty plus years, Barry can still instill such hate in young, immature males. On a recent trip with us, a male friend heard Barry singing on Serius. His comment, "How refreshing to be able to understand every word he's saying without one swear word."
In a crazy world filled with so much hate, violence, poverty and intolerance, why do some people have to waste their time saying stupid and sometimes nasty things about one of the most talented musicians in the world? Ok, if you can't appreciate his talent that's you're loss, but bashing him only shows how immature and disgusting you can be. Maybe you are just envious of all of Barry's Manilow's success, fame and appeal to women. He didn't sell 75 million albums by accident. To those of us who do appreciate Barry's music, it is like comfort food in an insane world.
"I take music pretty seriously. (Pulling up left sleeve) You see that scar on my wrist? Do you know what that's from? I heard the Bee Gees were getting back together again. I couldn't take it, okay? That was the only good thing about the eighties -- we got rid of one of the Bee Gees. One down, three to go. That's what I say, folks. Here's ten bucks, bring me the head of Barry Manilow. I want to drink beer out of his empty head. I want to have a Barry Manilow skull-keg party in my apartment, okay? You write the songs, we'll drink the beer out of your head. Barry Manilow -- that's the U.S. contribution to world culture?" -- Dennis Leary
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