By ANNIE ZALESKI
In a post today, Idolator spotlighted the Creepy Crawl's long-standing list of "Top 39 Annoying Things That Bands Do." Now, that list has been up for as long as I can remember -- and I've lived here for three years now. And in light of the club's declining number of shows (if not the quality of shows it hosts), some of these items are quite funny. To wit:
8. Bands that spell their names with a strange spelling twist e.g., junkeez, katz etc. After meeting the band, however, we are left with the impression that they didn't intentionally try and spell their name with a twist but rather they probably just don't know how to spell.
Bands currently booked at the venue:
Dedwayte
Auburne Trayce
Gas Money:INCORRECT UNDERSTANDING: $200 is not gas money. $200 is we're partying all night on the East Side and getting privates at Roxy's for everyone in the band.
Reality:
Um, today? $200 might barely cover a band heading to Kansas City.
What's not acknowledged in the list is the following MySpace bulletin, which is reposted frequently -- and, judging from grumblings on mailing lists I'm on -- has pissed off a lot of bands in town...

From its MySpace profile:
Hey, I've got some available dates for you guys at the Creepy Crawl if your up for playing any of these shows:
Thurs.
July 3
Sat.
July 5
Sat.
July 12
Fri.
July 18
Sat.
July 19
Fri.
July 25
Sat.
July 26
You'd have to try and sell tix and leave off a $70 deposit when you pick them up. Tix sell for $7 and you keep your sales from the first 10 tickets to make your deposit back and then make $4.50 a ticket after that.
Also, if you are in a METAL band only (i.e., no screamo, emo) I've got some available dates for our Sunday Night Slaughter shows.
Sunday June 29 (Sunday Night Slaughter Showcase)
Sunday July 6 (Sunday Night Slaughter Showcase)
Sunday July 13 (Sunday Night Slaughter Showcase)
Sunday July 20 (Sunday Night Slaughter Showcase)
You'd have to try and sell tix for these shows. Tix sell for $7 and you make $4 per ticket after you sell 10.
No deposit is required for picking up tickets for the Sunday Night Slaughter shows but band slots are assigned on those shows based on ticket sales.
If you'd like any of these dates, please contact me.
Thanks,
Kelsey/JP Concerts
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Dear nightclub owner,
"Paying the soundguy" or "covering the club's expenses" is not the artists problem. It has never been the artists problem and fuck you for even suggesting that the artist (esp the ones on tour) should subjugate themselves so that yet another person can get paid-in-full before the artist themselves sees a penny.
If you cannot seem to handle running a club properly, then shut it down or sell the club to someone who can add, subtract and clean a toilet.
Conversely, any artist dumb enough to fall for a "pay to play" deserves what they get.
I didn't even know it moved; that definitely happened less than three years ago.
I used to love that place, but it wouldn't be the same without a walk to Chinese Express.
Sound guys DO need to get paid, but paying to play the Creepy Crawl is pretty lame, especially on those percentages! I doubt they pay the staff a sliding scale based on that 35-45%!