The Buzz Under the Stars event featuring Weezer, Coheed and Cambria, and Manchester Orchestra morphed into Buzz Under the Storm Clouds featuring Heat Stroke show on Friday night. The smell of puke and sweat filled City Market as hotter-than-hell temperatures took their toll on enthusiastic Weezer fans. I saw six people barf their brains out, and one postmenopausal woman lay on the ground as KCFD personnel took her blood pressure and she stuffed her face with some sort of meat sandwich.
I have an equation to demonstrate.
Overabundance of neck and facial tattoos accompanying missing teeth (a
stereotypical correlation of methamphetamine usage) plus 95-degree temperatures and 1 million percent humidity equals a pukefest populated by dehydrated dumb fucks.
Young and old alike, the offenders were everywhere, leading each other out of the center crowd of sweat-drenched Weezer-goers like zombies in search of bottled water instead of flesh and blood. People with glazed eyes and bellies full of beer littered the sides of the stage. The show continued, despite the approaching storm that never produced any cooling relief but did provide beautiful lighting giving the stage lights a run for their money.
From where I was standing, it looked as if a Ghostbusters-era Rick Moranis was doing his best Sally O'Malley (Molly Shannon's SNL character, "I'm 50!") impression. Rivers Cuomo sure didn't act like a guy who's fortieth birthday is next week and who -- less than six months ago -- suffered cracked ribs and internal bleeding as a result of a tour bus accident. Cuomo's teenage speed-freak energy level was no reflection of the extreme temperature or the onset of middle age. He even rocked his Member's Only jacket for the majority of the set. This guy's calorie-burning kicks, jumps, and cross-stage sprints were enough to inspire lighting bugs to dance and sway with the music. Most people sang along to the new stuff and everyone sang along to the oldies. Tribal armband tattoos were raised in unison as thousands of people chanted, If you want to destroy my sweater.
There was a reoccurring theme of fans that I observed Friday night. The groups of people -- usually two to four gathered around each other -- consisted of one really obnoxious person singing at the top of his/her lungs pointing and jumping up and down while the others looked down at the ground or tried really hard to look past their super-Weezer fan. Obviously, the friends there for support mouthed the words casually, but that one super-fan in every group just had to take it that much further. The energy from the stage was almost overwhelming; but, really? Do you need to point your sweaty index finger millimeters from your friends' faces and yell, Beverly Hills! That's where I want to be? Is it necessary? I urge you to reconsider. I feel like some of that passion has been misdirected and could, perhaps, be used in a different vehicle of music. I'm just saying.
The highlight of the show was an absurd encore that included a mash-up of MGMT's hit "Kids" and Lady Gaga's "Poker Face." I can respect a band who can pull that off in a nerd-core, I'm 40 kind of way. Sort of.
It's not their fault, but Manchester Orchestra got swallowed by the heat: like a piece of stale bread being dipped in scalding soup, the tempo of nearly every song seemed to get soggier and soggier with each riff. However, I enjoyed their set the most out of all the bands of the night, including Weezer: despite the sweat, they sounded relaxed, mellow, and polished.
Coheed and Cambria had the crowd wrapped around their proverbial finger. Although it may have been my location (Northern side-stage), the sound was just awful, as I watched almost everyone dance and yell lyrics to each other. (I couldn't justify getting any closer to that mob of 7,000 people pushing, puking, and sweating all over each other, so I hung back.) The sound quality suffered greatly, as I discovered when I went for a stroll around the perimeter of people. Nonetheless, I couldn't find a spot in City Market where C&C didn't sound like alley cats in heat singing into empty tin cans. I tried real hard to "feel it," but "the feeling" never came. I wasn't the only one, either. I overheard several groups of people remark that C&C didn't sound very good. Maybe the people that would disagree with this were the same people screeching the lyrics and -- effectively -- not hearing the band. Suck it! They were a disappointment.